Television
TV schedule Thursday 16th May 2019
Twirlywoos
Series 2, Episode 17 - Open And CloseThe Twirlywoos are at a theatre, where they watch the stage manager pressing a button which opens and closes the curtains.
Go 8 Bit DLC
Episode 9Twin Harry Potter actors, James and Oliver Phelps are the guests. Dara O Briain drops in to show off his gaming skills and and Ellie must decide if the Weasley Twin's all-time favourite title deserves a place in the hallowed Hall of Game.
Dennis & Gnasher Unleashed!
Series 1, Episode 5 - Escape From AzkabashDennis must escape detention and Bash Street School to make the Beanotown Brawny Bean Race before Walter wins it. With the help of a note placed in his desk, he must sneak past Mrs Creecher and make a run for it - unless the mysterious note giver stops him first.
A Sharp Intake Of Breath
Series 2, Episode 1 - Your MoveSheila's suddenly desperate to move home. She's never been happy living in their current home - apparently! All this is news to Peter, who's forced to engage with local estate agents.
Danger Mouse
Series 2, Episode 46 - Duplicate MouseDanger Mouse teams up with a duplicate team of Danger Agents to stop Big Head.
Bitz & Bob
Series 2, Episode 12 - Amazing Owl ClubBitz and Purl start the Amazing Owl Club, with a special badge with flapping owl wings that allows members entry to the exclusive clubhouse.
Go 8 Bit DLC
Episode 10Comedian Helen Thorn joins host Ellie Gibson and co-hosts Steve McNeil and Sam Pamphilon. Dara O Briain drops in to show off his gaming skills and and Ellie must decide if Helen's all-time favourite title deserves a place in the hallowed Hall of Game.
Goodnight Sweetheart
Series 3, Episode 2 - It Ain't Necessarily SoIn the run-up to New Year's Eve, Gary worries about finding a way to see in the New Year with both Phoebe and Yvonne. Then Mrs Bloss threatens to chuck him out of his bedsit.
The Reluctant Bride
A repeat of this 1955 film.
Go Jetters
Series 2, Episode 50 - Horsetail Fall, CaliforniaThe Go Jetters have travelled to Horsetail Fall in the Yosemite National Park. It's a 300m-high waterfall made of melted snow.
Goodnight Sweetheart
Series 3, Episode 3 - One O'Clock JumpGary is worried about Yvonne's depression at being out of work and confused by the fact that the present PC Deadman is obviously Reg's grandson and yet Reg doesn't have any children.
Justin's House
Series 3, Episode 5 - Robert's BookRobert is trying to read a book, but Justin and Little Monster really want him to play with them instead.
On The Buses
Series 5, Episode 2 - Stan's RoomUnable to get a moment's peace with clippie Doreen, Stan argues with his mother's rules and meddling and decides to move out. But only one room is near his price range - and Blakey is the landlord!
Horrible Histories
Series 3, Episode 7Robert Walpole struggles to talk to England's German King; the Roman Emperors channel the King of Pop in their musical argument; and more...
Last Of The Summer Wine
Christmas Special - Getting Sam HomeIn answer to his one last request, Compo, Clegg and Foggy reluctantly sneak Sam out of his invalid bed for a final frolic with the not so young as she used to be Lily-Bless-Her. Then - with an unthinking lack of gratitude and a smile on his face - Sam drops them right in it by becoming far more trouble dead than alive...
Sooty
Series 1, Episode 13 - Drive In The CountryIt is Richard's day off so Sooty and Sweep have helped him prepare a picnic. But with Sooty-Stig driving the campervan, a flat tyre and no petrol, will Richard ever get a peaceful drive in the country?
On The Buses
Series 5, Episode 3 - The Best ManThe Inspector's niece is getting married to one of the drivers and much to Blakey's alarm, Stan is to be Best Man. He and Jack proceed to get the groom very, very drunk indeed.
Twirlywoos
Series 2, Episode 18 - On Top OfThe Twirlywoos are in a clothes boutique, where they watch a lady trying on different hats. She isn't satisfied with any of them, and goes off to try on a dress.
Minder
Series 9, Episode 8 - The Roof Of All EvilLong-running comedy drama about the London criminal underworld, focusing on dodgy entrepreneur Arthur Daley and his 'minder', Terry.
Never The Twain
Series 4, Episode 2 - Words And MusicCaroline rashly asks Simon and Oliver to supply the entertainment for her charity luncheon.
George & Mildred
Series 5, Episode 1 - Finders Keepers?When George finds a lost credit card, he wonders if there might be a reward. Meanwhile, Mildred suspects that another wedding anniversary will go by, forgotten, and Jeffrey is bothered by Tristram's new playmates.
Get Some In!
Series 1, Episode 4The boys are looking forward to their first leave, and an opportunity to get out of the camp at last. A dance at the local village hall beckons.
Last Of The Summer Wine
Christmas Special - The Loxley LozengeA previous experience with Wesley Pegden and his home-made racing car should have been warning enough. But when Compo, Clegg and Foggy learn that the chap needs expert assistance with what can only be described as a once-in-a-lifetime discovery, how could they refuse?
Hi-De-Hi!
Series 4, Episode 7 - The Epidemic'Chads' are threatening to engulf the camp. In their efforts to hold them back, Barry puts his back out, so Yvonne calls an old partner in and Fred learns things about himself he never knew.
2point4 Children
Series 2, Episode 2 - Bedtime For BonzoHaving finally found work with a little help from Rona, Bill's been stuck on the night shift preparing airline meals. If that wasn't bad enough, the Porters have agreed to look after their neighbour's chronically flatulent dog.
The Green Green Grass
Series 1, Episode 1 - Keep On RunningDenzil calls about Boycie's house bringing news that the infamous Driscoll Brothers are being released early from prison and they're on the hunt for the supergrass who helped get them banged up. Boycie is horrified. By the time Marlene and Tyler return, he's sold the house, sold the car dealership and planned a new life in Shropshire.
Mr Bean
Series 1, Episode 3 - Artful BeanMr Bean gets a real bug for painting. Then several bugs ... and flies and slugs and mice.
Mr Bean
Series 1, Episode 4 - The FlyMr Bean declares war when he finds a fly in his room, and searches for ever more outlandish weapons.
The Green Green Grass
Series 1, Episode 2 - A Rocky StartDetermined to settle down to a quiet, village life, Boycie's first job is to sack the farm manager and ingratiate himself with the locals. Marlene is scathing - the farm has no animals and no crops - so what do these people do all day? But, undeterred, Elgin talks Boycie into starting a proper farm and their first priority is to buy a bull from a bankrupt local farmer who is fond of a drink or two.
Twirlywoos
Series 1, Episode 14 - GoneThe Twirlywoos find out what happens when a toy train goes into a tunnel, and have some trouble with disappearing tea.
Millie Inbetween
Series 3, Episode 1 - Dad's New FlatDad, Amber and co move into a bigger flat - with an extra bedroom. But when Fran, Jake and the girls clash over who will have the new room, Millie and Lauren feel pushed out and decide the answer is to stay permanently at mum's house.
Meet The Adebanjos
A British-African sitcom following a larger-than-life father struggling to instil his old-fashioned African values in his reluctant British household.
Last Of The Summer Wine
Christmas Special - Getting Sam HomeIn answer to his one last request, Compo, Clegg and Foggy reluctantly sneak Sam out of his invalid bed for a final frolic with the not so young as she used to be Lily-Bless-Her. Then - with an unthinking lack of gratitude and a smile on his face - Sam drops them right in it by becoming far more trouble dead than alive...
Meet The Adebanjos
A British-African sitcom following a larger-than-life father struggling to instil his old-fashioned African values in his reluctant British household.
Shaun The Sheep
Series 2, Episode 28 - Zebra Ducks Of The SerengetiAfter getting covered in soot, two hapless ducks are mistaken for a pair of rare African Zebra Ducks. Seeing a way to make money, the farmer transforms Shaun's field into an exotic duck enclosure, which he gleefully opens to the public. Shaun doesn't appreciate losing his field and sets about exposing the fraud.
Zig And Zag
Episode 2 - DI Why?When Zig and Zag's kitchen stool gets broken in a pancake-tossing incident, Mr Jones suggests DIY.
Lovejoy
Series 5, Episode 8 - Poetic LicenceWhen Charlotte asks Lovejoy to help her value the contents of a private nursing home it seems straightforward enough - until there is an attempt on Lovejoy's life.
Bitz & Bob
Series 1, Episode 16 - Little Bev Riding HoodIt's the Fairy Tale Theatre Company's play of Little Bev Riding Hood, directed by Purl, and Bitz has built an amazing stage.
Minder
Series 9, Episode 9 - Last Orders At The WinchesterLong-running comedy drama about the London criminal underworld, focusing on dodgy entrepreneur Arthur Daley and his 'minder', Terry.
Last Of The Summer Wine
Christmas Special - The Loxley LozengeA previous experience with Wesley Pegden and his home-made racing car should have been warning enough. But when Compo, Clegg and Foggy learn that the chap needs expert assistance with what can only be described as a once-in-a-lifetime discovery, how could they refuse?
Hi-De-Hi!
Series 4, Episode 7 - The Epidemic'Chads' are threatening to engulf the camp. In their efforts to hold them back, Barry puts his back out, so Yvonne calls an old partner in and Fred learns things about himself he never knew.
Go Jetters
Series 2, Episode 51 - Ilulissat, GreenlandGrandmaster Glitch has taken his teddy, Cuddles, to Ilulissat in Greenland to show him the sights, but Cuddles falls out of Grim HQ and gets stuck in the snow.
Gigglebiz
Series 5, Episode 1 - Enrico's Duck DanceKeith Fitt attempts to break a hook-a-duck world record, Gail Force hosts a new chat show, and Dina Lady tries to deliver a birthday cake.
Waffle The Wonder Dog
Series 1, Episode 4 - Waffle ExploresIt's Evie and Doug's first playdate together with their friends. They try out their new ball pit, but Waffle can't join in because he's not toilet trained. He finds fun elsewhere.
Birds Of A Feather
Series 1, Episode 1 - NickedSharon is poor with a low-life husband, her sister Tracey lives the high life in a luxury house, but when their husbands are sent to prison for armed robbery they are forced to live together, next to Chigwell's most vivacious socialite.
2point4 Children
Series 2, Episode 2 - Bedtime For BonzoHaving finally found work with a little help from Rona, Bill's been stuck on the night shift preparing airline meals. If that wasn't bad enough, the Porters have agreed to look after their neighbour's chronically flatulent dog.
Robin's Nest
Series 6, Episode 3 - No Smoke Without FireAlbert gets suspicious when he thinks Gertrude is having an affair with another man.
One Exciting Night
A repeat of this 1944 film.
Get Some In!
Series 1, Episode 4The boys are looking forward to their first leave, and an opportunity to get out of the camp at last. A dance at the local village hall beckons.
Whatever Happened To The Likely Lads?
Series 1, Episode 3 - Cold FeetWith his impending marriage approaching, Bob is having doubts. All his friends seem to be getting divorced and his relationship with Thelma has been up-and-down. Deep down he knows she is the right girl for him but Terry is hardly giving him the encouragement he craves.
The Green Green Grass
Series 1, Episode 1 - Keep On RunningDenzil calls about Boycie's house bringing news that the infamous Driscoll Brothers are being released early from prison and they're on the hunt for the supergrass who helped get them banged up. Boycie is horrified. By the time Marlene and Tyler return, he's sold the house, sold the car dealership and planned a new life in Shropshire.
Never The Twain
Series 4, Episode 2 - Words And MusicCaroline rashly asks Simon and Oliver to supply the entertainment for her charity luncheon.
As Time Goes By
Series 2, Episode 3 - Visiting RockyAfter a trip on a rowing lake that leaves him feeling rather old and rather embarrassed, Lionel takes Jean to Hampshire to meet his father - who has a surprise announcement to make.
The Green Green Grass
Series 1, Episode 2 - A Rocky StartDetermined to settle down to a quiet, village life, Boycie's first job is to sack the farm manager and ingratiate himself with the locals. Marlene is scathing - the farm has no animals and no crops - so what do these people do all day? But, undeterred, Elgin talks Boycie into starting a proper farm and their first priority is to buy a bull from a bankrupt local farmer who is fond of a drink or two.
Goodnight Sweetheart
A selection of episodes from the fifth series of the time-travel sitcom.
Horrible Histories
Series 2, Episode 9The Stuarts are confused by the newly discovered drink tea, a Viking funeral ends in a massive fight, a child evacuated in the Blitz thinks farm animals are monsters, and some cowboys sing about life in the Wild West.
Dad's Army
Series 6, Episode 4 - We Know Our OnionsThe platoon go on a course with a van full of onions that Walker has sold to Hodges. While the men start to fall behind in their training, Hodges makes an attempt to get his onions.
Last Of The Summer Wine
Series 9, Episode 2 - The Heavily Reinforced BottomIn Seymour's opinion, what Compo urgently needs is some tough physical exercise to get himself back into peak condition, and there is no better way of achieving this than the ideal combination of Compo, a canal and a canoe.
Mr Bean
Series 1, Episode 3 - Artful BeanMr Bean gets a real bug for painting. Then several bugs ... and flies and slugs and mice.
Mr Bean
Series 1, Episode 4 - The FlyMr Bean declares war when he finds a fly in his room, and searches for ever more outlandish weapons.
Dad's Army
Series 6, Episode 5 - The Honourable ManA member of the Soviet Union is visiting Walmington, and it is up to Mainwaring to make a speech. However, it looks like Wilson may replace him after the Sergeant inherits a family title and becomes 'The Honourable Arthur Wilson'.
Have I Got News For You
Series 49, Special - Have I Got Election News For YouGuest host Jo Brand is joined by regular team captains Paul Merton and Ian Hislop and guest panellists Romesh Ranganathan and Jon Snow for a special episode reacting to the General Election results.
Blockbusters
Series 1, Episode 8Dara schools sixth former contestants Adam, Tia and Amy as they take on this iconic trivia-based quiz for the chance to win some epic prizes.
So Awkward
Series 2, Episode 4 - The KissWhen Jas asks Lily what her first kiss with Matt was like Lily panics - there hasn't been a first kiss yet! It makes her doubt whether they are actually going out. Phobic Ollie is tested to the max, and Mr Malone is freaked out because he thinks Mrs Griggs is flirting with him.
Citizen Khan
Series 3, Episode 5 - Stags And HensIt's the day of Shazia's hen do, and she's looking forward to having some fun with her friends. Unfortunately, though, she ends up with a few extra guests in tow.
Open All Hours
Mean-yet-loveable northern shopkeeper Arkwright is allergic to spending money - much to the trouble of his put-upon nephew and sole employee Granville.
Mid Morning Matters With Alan Partridge
Series 1, Episode 1 - Broth + MuppetAlan talks to charity cyclist Jim Jones whilst waiting for celebrity guest Anthea Turner, before struggling to talk military tactics with special forces Afghanistan veteran Tommy Gaskell.
Live At The Apollo
Series 4, Episode 3 - Sean Lock and Jason ManfordStand-up comedy from the 8 Out Of 10 Cats team captains Sean Lock and Jason Manford.
There's Something About Movies
Series 1, Episode 3Alan Carr sorts the film buffs from the film duffs as he puts Tom Allen, Matthew Broderick, Jennifer Saunders and Phil Wang's film trivia to the test.
Citizen Khan
Series 3, Episode 6 - The WeddingThe day of the wedding of Mr Khan's daughter Shazia to 'pakora short of a picnic' Amjad has finally arrived, but all is not well in the Khan household.
Mid Morning Matters With Alan Partridge
Series 1, Episode 2 - Mustard + PepperAmid a mix of anecdotes, facts and tips, Alan and Simon ask listeners to vote for Norfolk's greatest person before indulging in a spot of wine tasting live on air.
The Inbetweeners
Series 2, Episode 3 - Will's BirthdayIt's Will's birthday, and he's planning a suitably grown-up dinner. Unfortunately, Will's party clashes with a far more popular one.
Little Britain
Series 2, Episode 6Lou and Andy go to the seaside, while Dafydd has been to a rugby match.
8 Out Of 10 Cats
Series 13, Episode 5Jimmy Carr once again oversees the disputes and deliberations on the topical events that set the nation's chins wagging as Jon Richardson and Sean Lock are joined by guests Nick Helm, Kate Humble, David O'Doherty and Claudia Winkleman.
Jason Manford Live: First World Problems
TV broadcast of Jason Manford's 2014 live stand-up DVD, First World Problems.
My Dad Wrote A Porno
Recording of the live stage show of podcast My Dad Wrote A Porno.
Sliced
Series 1, Episode 2Naomi announces she's going on a date and Joshua tries to make her jealous by announcing that he's going on a date himself.
Celebrity Juice
Series 21, Episode 9Keith Lemon presents as Holly Willoughby takes on Paddy McGuinness. They're joined by Stefflon Don, film star Jaime Winstone, TV presenter Anita Rani and comedian Jimmy Carr.
Lee And Dean
Series 2, Episode 6The boys are in Spain and have never been happier. They're working hard and enjoying life in the sun, until a grisly discovery sends them spiralling back to their old ways.
Derry Girls
Series 2, Episode 5 - The PromJenny Joyce organises a 50s style prom but the girls are more intrigued by the arrival of a new girl at Lady Immaculate. Erin, Clare and Michelle are looking for prom dates but Orla has already got someone special in mind.
Inside No. 9
Series 3, Episode 2 - The BillA group of friends go for a night out at a local restaurant. Soon an argument erupts about who is going to pay the bill.
Derry Girls
Series 2, Episode 6 - The PresidentAs Christmas approaches, excitement in Derry is at fever pitch for President Bill Clinton's visit. Meanwhile James gets a surprise and Granda Joe embarks on a mysterious plan of his own.
Hypothetical
Series 1, Episode 2Josh Widdicombe and James Acaster are joined by Romesh Ranganathan, Rachel Parris, Jon Richardson and Rose Matafeo.
Never The Twain
Series 4, Episode 2 - Words And MusicCaroline rashly asks Simon and Oliver to supply the entertainment for her charity luncheon.
The IT Crowd
Series 4, Episode 3 - Something HappenedDouglas becomes a Spaceologist, Roy's life is changed by a bad back, and Jen gets involved with a rock band.
Inside No. 9
Series 3, Episode 3 - The Riddle Of The SphinxNina thinks Professor Squires has all the answers when, actually, neither has a clue what the future holds.
Get Some In!
Series 1, Episode 4The boys are looking forward to their first leave, and an opportunity to get out of the camp at last. A dance at the local village hall beckons.
QI
Series O, Episode 11 - Objects And OrnamentsSandi Toksvig looks at some Objects And Ornaments. Along the way, you'll discover where you can find an actual UFO, and meet the world's best-dressed crab. With Sarah Millican, Alice Levine and Cariad Lloyd.
The IT Crowd
Series 4, Episode 4 - Italian For BeginnersRoy gets obsessed by his latest girlfriend's sad family history, while Jen tells an absolute whopper to get some attention.
Limmy's Show!
Series 3, Episode 3What happens to a small community when its famous children's television show Dream Scheme is cancelled?
The Russell Howard Hour
Series 1, Christmas Special - Russell Howard Christmas SpecialThis week, Russell is joined by comedian John Oliver, in his first British TV appearance since 2006.
8 Out Of 10 Cats Does Countdown
Series 16 (Channel 4: Series 17), Episode 1Sean Lock and Johnny Vegas take on guest captain Alan Carr and Lou Sanders. Plus The Brett Domino Trio join Susie Dent in Dictionary Corner, while maths whizz Rachel Riley looks after the numbers.
Get Cracking
George Formby comedy.
Joe Lycett's Got Your Back
Series 1, Episode 6Joe Lycett fights for the consumer rights of the Great British public. This time, Joe and celebrity guest Liza Tarbuck take on the housing market and send a letting agent packing.
Limmy's Show!
Series 3, Episode 4Zoned-out waster Dee Dee has the night of his life after making an impressive find outside his local charity shop and Falconhoof takes Adventure Call to the dizzy new heights of smellyvision.
Would I Lie To You?
Series 7, Episode 4Lee Mack and David Mitchell are joined by Matt Dawson, Mel Giedroyc, Josh Widdicombe and Dermot O'Leary.
Meet The Adebanjos
A British-African sitcom following a larger-than-life father struggling to instil his old-fashioned African values in his reluctant British household.
There's Something About Movies
Series 1, Episode 3Alan Carr sorts the film buffs from the film duffs as he puts Tom Allen, Matthew Broderick, Jennifer Saunders and Phil Wang's film trivia to the test.
Russell Howard's Good News
Series 6, Highlights Special - Best BitsRussell picks his very best bits from this series, as well as some never-seen-before clips. He is joined by his favourite mystery guest from the news and the finest members of the public who stepped up to the 'People's Podium', alongside a special heartwarming tale to see the show out.
Inside No. 9
Series 3, Episode 2 - The BillA group of friends go for a night out at a local restaurant. Soon an argument erupts about who is going to pay the bill.
Sliced
Series 1, Episode 2Naomi announces she's going on a date and Joshua tries to make her jealous by announcing that he's going on a date himself.
Meet The Adebanjos
A British-African sitcom following a larger-than-life father struggling to instil his old-fashioned African values in his reluctant British household.
Inside No. 9
Series 3, Episode 3 - The Riddle Of The SphinxNina thinks Professor Squires has all the answers when, actually, neither has a clue what the future holds.
Alan Davies: As Yet Untitled
Series 3, Episode 3Alan is joined by Aisling Bea, Justin Moorhouse, Jo Enright and Jim Moir (Vic Reeves) to discuss such varied subjects as living without central heating, performing stand-up at weddings and mansions, stories of stealing, befriending old men, Jim's working with pigs experiences and being star-struck.
Derry Girls
Series 2, Episode 5 - The PromJenny Joyce organises a 50s style prom but the girls are more intrigued by the arrival of a new girl at Lady Immaculate. Erin, Clare and Michelle are looking for prom dates but Orla has already got someone special in mind.
Steptoe And Son
Series 4, Episode 3 - Those Magnificent Men And Their Heating MachinesHarold has bought a whole central heating system and plans to install it all himself.
Marley's Ghosts
Series 1, Episode 2The ghosts are still in residence at Marley's, and they're driving her up the wall - and out of the house.
Derry Girls
Series 2, Episode 6 - The PresidentAs Christmas approaches, excitement in Derry is at fever pitch for President Bill Clinton's visit. Meanwhile James gets a surprise and Granda Joe embarks on a mysterious plan of his own.
Limmy's Show!
Series 3, Episode 3What happens to a small community when its famous children's television show Dream Scheme is cancelled?
Have I Got News For You
Series 52, Episode 10Paul Merton and Ian Hislop are joined by guest host Gary Lineker, panellist Jon Richardson and a handbag.
The Inbetweeners
Series 2, Episode 3 - Will's BirthdayIt's Will's birthday, and he's planning a suitably grown-up dinner. Unfortunately, Will's party clashes with a far more popular one.
Harry Hill's TV Burp
Series 11, Episode 5Under Harry's TV microsope this week are Tamara Ecclestone, with her billion-dollar lifestyle struggle, and animal mimicry in Wild Britain With Ray Mears.
The IT Crowd
Series 4, Episode 3 - Something HappenedDouglas becomes a Spaceologist, Roy's life is changed by a bad back, and Jen gets involved with a rock band.
The Alternative Comedy Experience
Series 1, Episode 12 - Job SecurityTonight Henning Wehn is joined by Simon Munnery, Maeve Higgins, Phil Nichol and Boothby Graffoe, with interviews from Stewart Lee.
Duck Quacks Don't Echo
Series 5, Episode 5This week's guests are Danny Baker, Roisin Conaty and Jack Dee.
The IT Crowd
Series 4, Episode 4 - Italian For BeginnersRoy gets obsessed by his latest girlfriend's sad family history, while Jen tells an absolute whopper to get some attention.