Series R, Episode 5 - Rubbish
- This episode was recorded in March 2020, during the coronavirus outbreak. As a result, there is no studio audience.
- The entire set is covered in rubbish, while behind Sandi are signs normally found in packaging concerning recycling.
- Each of the buzzers features the sound of something that is repulsive, in that it is the sound of something that is used to repel something or someone else.
- Johnny: A snorting deer followed by a dog barking. This is used by Japanese trains to repel deer from the line and avoid being hit.
- Tangent: A long time ago Alan was in court for speeding. There were two other people before him who were charged with taking a bus. Alan first thought they were fare-dodgers, but it turned out they had actually stolen a bus. In the court the people talked seriously about the route they took through town and the carnage they caused, resulting in those charged trying to keep a straight face when clearly they had a great time. Johnny and a friend of his once got drunk on a carousel, sleeping on the top deck of a miniature bus. Alan mentions that people sleep on roller coasters when they try to break records, as people try to break the recorded for the longest time you can spend on one, and the record breakers are allowed five minutes of every hour to have a nap. Holly disapproves of this, saying that the record breakers should be made to go to the toilet off the side of the roller coaster. Sandi says that women would not do such a thing, to which Holly says: "Well, we've all done a motorway moony", to which Alan says no-one else has. However, Bridget says that she once did it in France. Bridget says that in France she was being taught how to drive a tractor by a farmer, but she didn't realise that the farmer had jumped off, and she had not been told how to make the tractor stop, meaning the only way she could stop it was crashing into a barn. It turned out the farmer was waving at her from two fields away.
- Bridget: A swarm of bees buzzing. This is used to repel elephants. Elephants are terrified of them, as they can go up the trunk, mouth and anus. In Kenya and Tanzania some farmers use beehive fences to stop elephants from trampling over their land. Elephants are so bee adverse that they make a specific rumbling sound to warn other elephants that bees are in the area.
- Holly: Heavy metal music. This is used to repel crickets. In Tuscarora, Nevada, the community was invaded by crickets annually, destroying crops, swarming houses and clogging up roads. In 2006, they discovered that if they played Led Zeppelin and Rolling Stones music at volume the crickets stopped coming.
- Tangent: A man named Stan, who was stage manager at the Comedy Store, would play "Ace of Spades" at the end of the late show at 2am to get rid of the audience. Heavy metal has been used to drive out people in hiding. General Noriega was bombarded with heavy metal when he was under siege.
- Tangent: Bridget talks again about her time on the farm. She was there because she wanted a different job from office work so decided to work on a farm for three days. The tractor incident happened on the second day. On the first day she milked cows by hand, and cows can tell from your touch if you are new to milking. The people milking the cows stand in a kind of "swimming pool", so the people are level with the feet of the cows. While Bridget was milking the cow defecated over her, but what was worse was that the farmer made Bridget stand in a corner of a courtyard and hosed her down. She quit before doing anything on the third day.
- Alan: A high-pitched tone. This is used as a mosquito alarm, but when the alarm is at the correct level it can only be heard by young people. The part of the ear that detects higher frequencies, a bone in the inner ear, is susceptible to wear and tear, which gets worse as you get older. They then play the tone as it should be heard, and it can only be heard by young people. One of the people who can hear it is one of the crew called Anna, aged 23. This alarm was invented by Howard Stapleton in 2005, who used his children as test subjects. This system is used by Burger King, 7-Eleven and Transport for London to deter young people who might cause trouble from hanging around, while some other businesses use classical and folk music. They demonstrate this by changing Alan's buzzer to play The Four Seasons and Anna goes away.
- Tangent: Alan was at a science show in Edinburgh were they did a test, playing a tone that became higher in frequency, and people were told to sit down when they stopped hearing it, resulting in the younger people being the last to sit down. They then did a second tone, but this time nothing was being played, so the people who were standing last were all lying.
- The thing that is brown and sicky is American chocolate. American chocolate tastes more tangy and bitter than European chocolate because the chocolate factories are further away from dairy farms in the US. Thus the milk has to travel for longer and the milk needs to undergo a chemical process that extends the shelf life. This produces a chemical called butyric acid, which you also find in parmesan cheese and vomit. Chocolate brands that don't use the same process sometimes add the acid to the chocolate because Americans have got used to it. American chocolate also contains much more sugar and fewer cocoa solids, having 10% compared to 20% in the UK.
- Tangent: The reason why chocolate goes white when it goes off is because the fat is rising to the surface. Alan once did a play in the West End in 2003, and an elderly lady who came to see the play several times gave Alan a Kit Kat. Alan ate it the next day and claimed it tasted exactly like an old lady's cupboard. He then looked at the sell-by date and it was listed as being 1998.
- Tangent: Hershey's made a special bar of chocolate in the 1930s that was designed for emergency US army rations. It was designed to be deliberately unappealing so that the soldiers didn't just tuck into it straight away. It was called a D ration or a Logan Bar after the colonel who first ordered their manufacture. The chocolate had a high-energy content and could withstand high temperatures, but tasted awful. Soldier's hated it so much they called it: "Hitler's secret weapon" because it made them ill. Holly and Alan were in the CCF (Combined Cadet Forces), with Alan in the army and Holly the RAF, and the CCF has a 24-hour ration kit, which they took on overnight manoeuvres and contain enough calories for a day. Again, the chocolate is designed to be unappealing.
- A question on recycling material: the point of all this blue whale shit is to keep the planet going. Blue whales defecate at the surface. They need to conserve oxygen and thus shut down lots of other processes when they are down at depth, including digestion. When they defecate they release a "faecal plume" of buoyant excrement, which is very rich in nutrients. It is full of iron, containing a concentration that is ten million times higher than the surrounding water. This fertilises phytoplankton, which photosynthesises, absorbs large amounts of carbon dioxide, and produces between 50-90% of the Earth's oxygen. Most of the oxygen we breathe is made by plankton. The problem is the small number of blue whales and the fact that when they die the whales sink to the bottom, taking 33 tonnes of stored carbon with them, the equivalent of 600 trees photosynthesising for an entire decade. The IMF calculated that one whale would cost about US$2 million, with the current stock of whales costing US$1 trillion. One benefit of the whales dying is that their bodies provide food for wildlife that live in the depths.
- The Danish trick that gets English pulses racing is washing. When the Vikings invaded in the 11th century, English women found them attractive because they washed more often than the native British men. The Vikings tended to come without women, so they married English women, upsetting the locals. One monk, John of Wallingford, claimed that Danes cheated by washing. He wrote: "The Danes made themselves too acceptable to English women by their elegant manners and their care of their person. They combed their hair daily and took a bath every Saturday, and even changed their clothes frequently, be which means they undermined the chastity of the wives." Thus there is a theory that all of that stories about Vikings raping and pillaging were written by Englishmen whose wives were taken by more attractive Danes, and another theory that when these good-looking Vikings arrived, they just had a washed and managed to woo the ladies.
- Tangent: A 2018 study by the US Center for Hygiene and Health in Boston claims that modern-day normal bath tubs contain 100 times as much bacteria than rubbish bins. They recommend that if you do take a bath you should shower before and afterwards. However, baths can still be good as it improves circulation and lowers blood pressure, and baths improve your mood more than physical exercise.
- The panel are given some metal cans are told to ready them for recycling. The problem with crushing them first is that different places require people to do different things to the cans first. More modern, automated machines have been made to recycle cans, which use the size and shape of the object in order to identify them. Thus, if you crush the can the machine might not recognise it and thus wrongly put it in the non-recycling pile. Also, different boroughs have different rules, so it is best to check with them first. In the borough where the show is being recorded, crushed cans could not be recycled. (Forfeit: Don't do that!)
- Tangent: Paper receipts are also problematic for recycling. Half of all receipts are non-recyclable. Some receipts are printed on thermal paper, which was used in early fax machines. This paper is coated in a chemical, and you cannot recycle the paper because the chemical would then be released into the atmosphere. It works by exposing the paper to heat, which causes the paper to turn black. Sandi demonstrates this by putting a receipt next to a hairdryer that turns the paper black.
- The last commercial flight to fly faster than the speed of sound probably came in very recently. On average, a flight from New York to London takes six hours, but the jet stream pushes the planes along. Under normal conditions the speed of sound is 760mph, but it does not cause a sonic boom because relative to the air that you are moving in, you are travelling under the speed of sound. It is akin to a man on a train running. (Forfeit: Concorde)
- Tangent: The fastest ever BA Concorde flight between New York and London was in 1996, taking two hours, 52 minutes and 59 seconds.
- The panel are told to point to a symbol on the set that tells you that you can recycle something. The problem is none of them do. The circular symbol depicting two interlocking green arrows means that the manufacturer of the product has made a financial contribution to the recovery and recycling of packaging in Europe. The symbol of a white arrow pointing to its tail means the product is widely recycled by 75% or more of local authorities. The symbol of three folded arrows pointing at each other in a clockwise direction means the product is theoretically recyclable, but there is no guarantee that your local borough will take it. (Forfeit: That one)
- Tangent: The UK produces over 44,000 metric tonnes of non-recycled waste every day. The amount of rubbish on the show's set is the UK average for the amount produced by one person per year at home. This is about 35 bin bags' worth, or 222kg, and this is just household waste.
- Tangent: In 2016, the waste clearance company Envirowaste compiled a list of the most unusual things that were discovered in waste in London. The list includes a dead stuffed cat dressed in a baby's onesie, a nude painting of Albert Einstein, a shoe box filled with dozens of mouse skeletons, a sealed box full of maggots, a bone of St. Clement of Rome (the fourth Pope), a Super Soaker full of urine, and a Victorian dildo.
- Thursday 25th June 2020
- BBC Two
- 30 minutes
Cast & crew
|Sandi Toksvig||Host / Presenter|
|Alan Davies||Regular Panellist|
|James Harkin||Script Editor|
|Anna Ptaszynski||Script Editor|
|Sandi Toksvig||Script Editor|
|Alex Bell||Question Writer|
|John Lloyd (as John Lloyd CBE)||Series Producer|
|Jonathan Paul Green||Production Designer|