Television
TV schedule Saturday 16th September 2017
Beauty And The Barge
Ethel is taken in by a barge skipper, to the fury of the widow he is courting.
Sooty
Series 2, Episode 4 - Sooty's Space RocketWhen Sooty builds his own space rocket, he is determined to be the first teddy bear on Mars. But when the rocket crash-lands on Mr. Slater's mobile toilet, will all his dreams go down the pan?
Twirlywoos
Series 2, Episode 26 - TwirlingThe Twirlywoos are at an ice rink, where they watch a young girl twirling around. The Twirlywoos can't resist having a go themselves, but when they try to twirl they find it's trickier than it looks! The Box visits the boat with a grass skirt which causes the wearer to twirl around. Toodloo performs a twirling routine and careers around the boat out of control.
The Darling Buds Of May
A selection of episodes from the third series of the David Jason comedy drama.
Goodnight Sweetheart
Series 4, Episode 9 - HeartachesIt is Gary and Phoebe's wedding day. Will Gary make it on time? Will he be there at all?
Scream Street
Series 1, Episode 8 - Banished!Otto plots to build himself a luxury home, which would mean forcing the Scream Street residents to live in tents.
Goodnight Sweetheart
Series 4, Episode 10 - Careless Talk...Gary is rapidly running out of money, and Ron has lost the will to print it.
Go Jetters
Series 1, Episode 36 - Tarbela Dam, PakistanWhen Grandmaster Glitch gets his hands on a G.O. Force, the forecast isn't good for the Tarbela Dam in Pakistan.
Lucky Feller
Episode 5 - It's A Dog's LifeShorty declares the news: he is in love. Randy's in hysterics, then shocked when Shorty reveals the identity of his infatuation. A trip to the pub is called for.
Margery And Gladys
One-off comedy starring June Brown and Penelope Keith.
The Piglet Files
Series 3, Episode 4 - In Which We ServePeter and the rest of the department are on the trail of a French agent. The operation takes them to a hotel hosting an industry conference.
Horrible Histories
Series 7, Episode 9 - Revolting Russian RevolutionOn its 100th anniversary, Horrible Histories takes a look at the Russian Revolution.
A Sharp Intake Of Breath
Series 4, Episode 2 - Match Of The DayAfter managing to secure a ticket to a major international football match at Wembley, Peter manages to lose - and reacquire - his ticket numerous times. Will he make it to see the big game?
Go Jetters
Series 1, Episode 19 - Amazon Rainforest, South AmericaGlitch wants a picnic so he stops the rain in the rainforest, upsetting the local tree frogs.
Butterflies
Sitcom following dissatisfied housewife Ria Parkinson as she considers embarking on an exciting romantic affair with successful businessman Leonard.
Only Fools And Horses
Series 7, Christmas Special - Rodney Come HomeAfter thumping Cassandra's boss on the nose, Rodney is now estranged from his wife and living back at the Trotter's flat. Del tries all his devious tricks to get them back together.
Mr Bean
A selection of episodes from the first series of the animated version of Rowan Atkinson's comic creation.
Little Roy
Series 2, Episode 14 - The Dancing O'BriensRoy and Becky practice ballroom dancing with Mr and Mrs Barker. They surprise Bill and Maura with this present at their wedding anniversary party. But when the time comes to perform, Roy is struck down by terrible stage fright and ends up freezing frame. Sad over letting his parents down, Roy finds a way to overcome his fears and finish the dance with Becky.
Carry On Matron
Medical-based comedy from the Carry On team. A gang plan to raid a maternity hospital to steal a gigantic stock of birth control pills.
Only Fools And Horses
Series 5, Episode 5 - Video NastyRodney has been commissioned to make a film by the Local Community Arts Centre. Unfortunately, Del and Mickey Pearce take over, and the expensive equipment is soon covering weddings and all sorts - and then there's the cast and sponsor list for his production...
The Green Green Grass
Series 4, Episode 3 - Calendar BoysBored with life on the farm, Marlene throws herself into charity work. As a by-product of her efforts, Boycie senses an opportunity to become Sir Aubrey. Marlene, with the help of their staff, tries to use her charity contacts to help her husband achieve his dream. Unfortunately, life is very rarely that simple, particularly where Boycie and Marlene are concerned.
My Parents Are Aliens
Long-running children's sitcom following the lives of three orphaned children. Their new foster parents are secretly aliens.
Only Fools And Horses
A selection of eight episodes of Britain's most popular sitcom.
So Awkward
Series 3, Episode 3 - Science ChicA business studies competition is announced at school, and both Lily and Martha desperately want to be project manager.
The Big Money
Comedy about a small-time thief who becomes caught up in a world of organised crime after stealing a suitcase stuffed with forged £1 notes.
Shaun The Sheep
A selection of the top five episodes as picked by viewers.
Go Jetters
Series 1, Episode 19 - Amazon Rainforest, South AmericaGlitch wants a picnic so he stops the rain in the rainforest, upsetting the local tree frogs.
A Close Shave
Wallace's whirlwind romance with the proprietor of the local wool shop puts his head in a spin; but not all is well for Gromit.
Mr Bean
A selection of episodes from the first series of the animated version of Rowan Atkinson's comic creation.
Little Roy
Series 2, Episode 14 - The Dancing O'BriensRoy and Becky practice ballroom dancing with Mr and Mrs Barker. They surprise Bill and Maura with this present at their wedding anniversary party. But when the time comes to perform, Roy is struck down by terrible stage fright and ends up freezing frame. Sad over letting his parents down, Roy finds a way to overcome his fears and finish the dance with Becky.
Bean - The Ultimate Disaster Movie
Mr. Bean (Rowan Atkinson) finds himself in Los Angeles, masquerading as the National Gallery's top art expert and destroying everything in his wake.
Blankety Blank
Comedy panel-game-show of missing words hosted in turn by Terry Wogan, Les Dawson, Lily Savage and Bradley Walsh.
Gigglebiz
Series 3, Episode 3Rapids Johnson builds a hideout to try and spot those elusive bears, accident-prone DIY enthusiast DIY Dan attempts to construct a clothes rack and newsreader Arthur Sleep tells some pun-tastic jokes.
Blankety Blank
Comedy panel-game-show of missing words hosted in turn by Terry Wogan, Les Dawson, Lily Savage and Bradley Walsh.
Dad's Army
Series 4, Episode 7 - Put That Light Out!Jones, Frazer, Pike and Godfrey are stationed on an exercise in the local lighthouse, but soon cause trouble when they turn the light on and shine it over Walmington-on-Sea... during an air-raid.
Jonathan Creek
Series 2, Episode 5 - The Problem At Gallows Gate (Part 2)As Jonathan develops an unhealthy obsession with stockings and Maddy becomes infuriated with his s-less typewriter, they look as unlikely as the police to solve the killed-by-a-dead-man conundrum.
Not Going Out
Series 7, Christmas Special - WeddingThe will-they-won't-they tension between Lee and Lucy reaches new highs in this epic series finale for Christmas, as the couple find themselves in previously uncharted emotional water.
Horrible Histories
Series 7, Episode 9 - Revolting Russian RevolutionOn its 100th anniversary, Horrible Histories takes a look at the Russian Revolution.
John Bishop In Conversation With...
Series 3, Episode 1 - David WalliamsJohn sits down with David as he opens up about his life and career, including the evolution and success of Little Britain, his extraordinary sporting achievements for Sport Relief, and his acting and presenting roles. He speaks honestly about living with depression, his close relationship with his family and his love of writing for children.
Not Going Out
Christmas Special - Christmas ShoppingIt is Christmas Eve and newlyweds Lee and Lucy are doing some last-minute shopping when an unexpected stranger turns their Christmas upside down.
So Awkward
Series 3, Episode 3 - Science ChicA business studies competition is announced at school, and both Lily and Martha desperately want to be project manager.
A League Of Their Own
Series 12, Episode 1In the opening episode, the boys are joined by England and Tottenham Hotspur superstar Dele Alli, funnyman Stephen Mangan and comedian Rob Beckett.
My Parents Are Aliens
Long-running children's sitcom following the lives of three orphaned children. Their new foster parents are secretly aliens.
8 Out Of 10 Cats Does Countdown
Series 13 (Channel 4: Series 14), Episode 4In this show, captain Sean Lock and Vic Reeves take on captain Jon Richardson and Sara Pascoe. David O'Doherty joins Susie Dent in Dictionary Corner, while Rachel Riley takes care of the letters and numbers.
Michael McIntyre: Live & Laughing
A TV broadcast of Michael McIntyre's sell-out 2008 stand-up show which cemented the comic's status as one of the UK's top stand-up stars.
Stella
Series 6, Episode 1Stella is exhausted. And it's not just baby Holly that's keeping her awake at night...
The Jonathan Ross Show
Series 12, Episode 3 - Paul Hollywood, Noel Fielding, Jeff Bridges, Julianne Moore, Taron Egerton, Halle Berry, Craig DavidJonathan is joined by Paul Hollywood and Noel Fielding from The Great British Bake Off. Also appearing are Hollywood legends Jeff Bridges and Julianne Moore, young British star Taron Egerton, and Oscar winning actress Halle Berry. Plus Craig David will be performing in the studio.
Mrs. Brown's Boys
Series 1, Episode 4 - Mammy Rides AgainAgnes and Winnie gatecrash Maria's hen party, but realise that they have the wrong venue. Later, having invited Maria's snooty mother Mrs Nicholson to dinner, a nervous Agnes shores up her confidence with alcohol, but chaos ensues as the evening proceeds.
Live At The Apollo
Series 9, Episode 6 - Nina Conti, Rob Beckett, JimeoinNina Conti presents, with special guests Rob Beckett and Jimeoin.
Sam Delaney's News Thing
Episode 35 - The Strike Strikes BackSam attempts to bring back the glory days of strikes and Brexit MP David Davies explains which immigrants need to be sent back on Sam's Millennium Falcon. With Susie Boniface, Bobby Mair and Zoe Lyons.
8 Out Of 10 Cats Does Countdown
Series 11 (Channel 4: Series 12), Episode 4Jimmy Carr hosts the panel game with Sean Lock and Joe Wilkinson taking on Jon Richardson and Jayde Adams. David Baddiel joins Susie Dent in Dictionary Corner, while Rachel Riley looks after the numbers and letters.
Dave Gorman: Modern Life Is Goodish
Series 2, Episode 3 - Just Chips That Haven't Been Made YetIt's Dave on Dave! Modern life gets a ribbing as Mr Gorman considers celebrity endorsements and reveals the Queen's 'thoughts' on insoles!
People Just Do Nothing
Series 4, Episode 5 - Stags & HensThe wedding is back on and the Kurupt FM crew are out on the town for the Stag Party.
Soft Beds, Hard Battles
Peter Sellers comedy set in a Parisian brothel during World War II.
8 Out Of 10 Cats Does Countdown
Series 11 (Channel 4: Series 12), Episode 5Jimmy Carr hosts a new edition of the irreverent take on the classic letters and numbers quiz. Jon Richardson and David Mitchell take on guest captain Joe Wilkinson and Roisin Conaty. Tom Allen joins Susie Dent in Dictionary Corner, while Rachel Riley looks after the numbers and letters.
Goodnight Sweetheart
Series 4, Episode 9 - HeartachesIt is Gary and Phoebe's wedding day. Will Gary make it on time? Will he be there at all?
Celebrity Juice
Series 18, Episode 1Joining the panel this week are actor Russell Tovey, singer Charli XCX, Love Island pals Chris and Kem and comedian Johnny Vegas.
On The Buses
Series 7, Episode 9 - The VisitBlakey's mother announces she's coming to Luxton to pay her son a visit, and the Butlers naturally offer to put her up for the couple of nights. But she soon proves to be even more dreadful than her son - demanding, mean and manipulative!
Outnumbered
Series 4, Episode 2Mum has enough of the boys' attitude to housework so sets out on a campaign to civilise them. Karen battles with chuggers and buying shoes, while Dad goes to war with a domestic appliance.
Goodnight Sweetheart
Series 4, Episode 10 - Careless Talk...Gary is rapidly running out of money, and Ron has lost the will to print it.
On The Buses
Series 7, Episode 10 - What The Stars ForetellThe Butler household is thrown into chaos when the stars foretell marital success for Mum and Olive - and they both set their eyes on Blakey! Meanwhile, the Luxton & District is being subsumed into a national company, so change is afoot at the depot.
Can You Keep It Up For A Week?
Infamous 1974 sex comedy, starring Jeremy Bulloch as walking disaster-area Gil.
The Piglet Files
Series 3, Episode 4 - In Which We ServePeter and the rest of the department are on the trail of a French agent. The operation takes them to a hotel hosting an industry conference.
8 Out Of 10 Cats Does Countdown
Series 11 (Channel 4: Series 12), Episode 4Jimmy Carr hosts the panel game with Sean Lock and Joe Wilkinson taking on Jon Richardson and Jayde Adams. David Baddiel joins Susie Dent in Dictionary Corner, while Rachel Riley looks after the numbers and letters.
Butterflies
Sitcom following dissatisfied housewife Ria Parkinson as she considers embarking on an exciting romantic affair with successful businessman Leonard.
Sean Lock: Lockipedia Live
TV edit of the 2010 stand-up show Lockipedia Live, starring Sean Lock.
Harry Hill's TV Burp
Series 9, Highlights Special - The Best Of TV Burp 6Clips include Rachel Stevens shaking like a leaflet on Strictly Come Dancing, Harry's take on Hole in the Wall, Bear Grylls and Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall getting another irreverent ribbing, and an Emu puppet with a striking resemblance to Gail Platt harassing Harry.
8 Out Of 10 Cats
Series 15, Episode 9Host Jimmy Carr and team captains Sean Lock and Jon Richardson are joined by celebrity guests Jimeoin, Joe Wilkinson, Nancy Dell'Olio and Greg Rutherford.
Harry Hill's TV Burp
Series 9, Special - Review Of The Year 2009Big-collared comic Harry Hill applies his forensic eye for comedy detail to all the telly you thought he had missed while he was away. With Harry at the helm, you can be sure there will be laughs aplenty - and with so many top clips, skits and quips, this bumper Burp is bursting at the seams with pure entertainment.