Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps

Janet gets a new job, but Donna's career is on the skids. Louise has a letter from her earth mother - but she can't open it. Jonny campaigns for baby changing facilities at the pub.

Donna is up for a big promotion at work; she'll be driving a transit van. But the job goes to a man and Donna decides it's sexism. She steals a transit van to prove she can drive it.

Janet decides to earn a living making squeaky elves for kids, but all her creations are horrifically ugly and Jonny thinks they are possessed. Janet begins to get too emotionally attached to the elves and asks Gaz to store them in his garage.

Donna crashes into them, and about three parked cars, in her stolen transit van. She gets the sack from her job. Jonny demands baby changing facilities in the pub and launches a "fathers for justice" type campaign.

Louise's adopted mum has given her a letter from her real mum. She can't open it. When she finally does, she finds her real mum was from a posh bit of Runcorn and is thrilled.