British Comedy Guide

Tell us a joke Page 14

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sootyj

  • Thursday 23rd January 2014, 4:27pm
  • England
  • 51,287 posts
Quote: playfull @ 23rd January 2014, 3:55 PM GMT

Noticed one or two of your posts start with this phrase...switch the tele off and get writing young man!


I am Magnum.

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sootyj

  • Thursday 23rd January 2014, 5:17pm
  • England
  • 51,287 posts

I went to a restaurant ate a whole Llama and then refused to pay the bill.
I was ungulatefull.

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danphobic

  • Thursday 23rd January 2014, 5:39pm
  • london, England
  • 224 posts

I am convinced there is a crock of comedy gold at the end of the rainbow of ungulate animals.

A sort of 'joke remix' of Andy Gilders hokey kokey:

All my early birthday parties were at DHL, first we'd play pass the parcel, then we'd play that game when you knock on someone's door and run away before they answer.

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Mr Darkly

  • Thursday 23rd January 2014, 5:43pm
  • In a wardrobe with a lion and a witch, England
  • 49 posts

Scientist say they have found a solid link between mental health and genius. I don't feel as bad about killing all those people now.

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Mr Darkly

  • Thursday 23rd January 2014, 7:08pm
  • In a wardrobe with a lion and a witch, England
  • 49 posts

The Russian government is said to be sending in special forces chefs so the Kiev's don't burn.

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sootyj

  • Thursday 23rd January 2014, 8:20pm
  • England
  • 51,287 posts

One of the things I loath on freelancing sites is jobs where people pay others to look for jobs for them.

Dude you're too lazy too steal jokes.

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Steve Sunshine

  • Thursday 23rd January 2014, 8:34pm
  • Dagenham, England
  • 14,614 posts

I just started a job at the Hokey Cokey company
My desk has an in tray & an out tray, but I feel there's something missing.

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sootyj

  • Thursday 23rd January 2014, 8:37pm
  • England
  • 51,287 posts

You're a brave man, they'll expect you to shake it all about and turn it around at the same time.

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playfull

  • Thursday 23rd January 2014, 8:42pm [Edited]
  • Nottingham, England
  • 1,858 posts

Did you hear about the Hokey Cokey flasher? In, out,...

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FunyHaHA Not Funy Strange

  • Thursday 23rd January 2014, 8:59pm
  • Essex, England
  • 455 posts

what's the best line anyone can think of to follow?

I went out with a girl called Hokey Cokey,

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danphobic

  • Thursday 23rd January 2014, 9:05pm
  • london, England
  • 224 posts
Quote: FunyHaHA Not Funy Strange @ 23rd January 2014, 8:59 PM GMT

I went out with a girl called Hokey Cokey,


I put my foot right in it and she left, legged out.

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Nil Putters

  • Thursday 23rd January 2014, 9:06pm
  • A galaxy far, far away or, England
  • 28,689 posts
Quote: FunyHaHA Not Funy Strange @ 23rd January 2014, 8:59 PM GMT

what's the best line anyone can think of to follow?

I went out with a girl called Hokey Cokey,


She was a c**t.

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danphobic

  • Thursday 23rd January 2014, 9:25pm [Edited]
  • london, England
  • 224 posts
Quote: FunyHaHA Not Funy Strange @ 23rd January 2014, 8:59 PM GMT

I went out with a girl called Hokey Cokey,


I asked for Okey Dokey, but she was with another client.

mentaL! Didn't know about about sickipedia, just had a quick scan through the first page and the one about benefits street being like sesames street (from someone here) is on there.

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billwill

  • Thursday 23rd January 2014, 9:51pm
  • North London, England
  • 5,833 posts
Quote: Steve Sunshine @ 23rd January 2014, 8:34 PM GMT

I just started a job at the Hokey Cokey company
My desk has an in tray & an out tray, but I feel there's something missing.


A shredder that shakes it all about.