British Comedy Guide

I went to a restaurant Page 2

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Marc P

  • Monday 2nd December 2013, 11:40am
  • England
  • 17,698 posts

After a few pints in the pub I went to a kebab shop and said I'll have what the staff are having. So they let me take a piss in the kitchen sink.

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sootyj

  • Monday 2nd December 2013, 11:43am
  • England
  • 51,287 posts

I went to a restaurant and said I'll have what MarcP's having
I have no idea what that was, but they bought me a large bucket and ordered a steam cleaner.

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Nogget

  • Monday 2nd December 2013, 11:48am
  • England
  • 6,620 posts

I went. to a restaurant and said have what sootyj is having

I went. to a restaurant and said have what sootyj is having

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stonked

  • Monday 2nd December 2013, 11:56am
  • Wisbech, England
  • 226 posts

I went to a sex addicts' restaurant and said "I'll have what the staff are having."

So they brought me a cigarette.

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gappy

  • Monday 2nd December 2013, 12:29pm
  • Oxford, England
  • 2,018 posts

I went to a pedant's restaurant and said "I'll have what the staff are having". They told me that "staff" is grammatically singular.

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sootyj

  • Monday 2nd December 2013, 12:30pm
  • England
  • 51,287 posts
Quote: gappy @ 2nd December 2013, 12:29 PM GMT

I went to a pedant's restaurant and said "I'll have what the staff are having". They told me that "staff" is grammatically singular.


So I asked what are they doing on Friday night?

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Carlos Manwelly

  • Monday 2nd December 2013, 1:17pm
  • Wales
  • 1,223 posts

I went to a dog rescue centre and said "I'll have what the staff is having"
So they gave me a bowl of pedigree chum and a squeaky toy.

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stonked

  • Monday 2nd December 2013, 1:29pm
  • Wisbech, England
  • 226 posts

I went to an all-you-can-eat restaurant and said "I'll have what the staff are having."

So they brought me a plate of left-overs.

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Carlos Manwelly

  • Monday 2nd December 2013, 1:32pm
  • Wales
  • 1,223 posts

I went to a restaurant and said "I'll have what the staff are having"

I waited an hour and the manager gave me £6.31

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Tursiops

  • Monday 2nd December 2013, 1:38pm
  • Welwyn Garden City, England
  • 9,788 posts

I went to a Moses themed restaurant and I said 'I'll have what the staff's having'.

So they brought me a live rodent.

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sglen

  • Monday 2nd December 2013, 1:45pm
  • Manchester, England
  • 599 posts
Quote: gappy @ 2nd December 2013, 12:29 PM GMT

I went to a pedant's restaurant and said "I'll have what the staff are having". They told me that "staff" is grammatically singular.

Laughing out loud

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Carlos Manwelly

  • Monday 2nd December 2013, 1:49pm
  • Wales
  • 1,223 posts

I went to a restaurant and said "I'll have what the staff are having"

And now I have a level 1 food and hygiene certificate

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Lazzard

  • Monday 2nd December 2013, 1:53pm [Edited]
  • Ludlow, England
  • 4,646 posts

I went to a restaurant and said " Oy, f**k-face, I'll have what the staff are having - and make it f**king snappy!"

I'm now having a wank into a bowl of leek & potato soup

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Nogget

  • Monday 2nd December 2013, 2:00pm
  • England
  • 6,620 posts
Quote: Lazzard @ 2nd December 2013, 1:53 PM GMT

I went to a restaurant and said " Oy, f**k-face, I'll have what the staff are having - and make it f**king snappy!"

I'm now having a wank into a bowl of leek & potato soup

Laughing out loud

Cock a leekie?

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sootyj

  • Monday 2nd December 2013, 2:14pm
  • England
  • 51,287 posts

I went to a restaurant and said I'll have what the staff are having
So they gave me 2 half lemons, and 2 half melons.