I submitted a few one-liners, but struggled to come up with much.

I only submitted a handful of one-liners. Topics:

Euro lottery winning bus drivers
Police fitness
Olympic torch
Shortage of helium

A few from me this week;

- Privatising roads
- Robot in bladder surgery
- Euromillions
- Nile Ranger
- Gregg Wallace divorce
- Chelsea interested in Hulk
- George Michael back on the road

Not too impressed with my output but we'll see

Only a few this week. Agh. The topics -

- Sunday trading laws
- Ken Barlow the Casanova
- Bomb under an olympics (basketball) site
- A dig at Dennis Waterman

It seems that EVERYONE has sent in an Ed Milliband office break in sketch same as me (but all with different angles). Also did

GPs standing in election against coalition candidates
Rock stars avoiding tax.

Only 5 oneliners this week as well. 5th week lull plus busy Mother's day.

Quote: David Salisbury @ March 21 2012, 12:29 AM GMT

It seems that EVERYONE has sent in an Ed Milliband office break in sketch same as me (but all with different angles).

View original

Perhaps we should put all of them on one reject thread and vote for the best? Well not all of them of course because one of them will undoubtedly be used by NJ!

Just irritated to be struck on the bus by the following this morning

"it's lovely parliament honoured Dame Edna's retirement by allowing her to adress them."

Quote: LippyAlison @ March 21 2012, 9:13 AM GMT

Perhaps we should put all of them on one reject thread and vote for the best?

View original

Like! Although that will be one long thread...

My one-liners were on:

Assad's iTunes playlist
The lottery winning bus drivers
UPS buying TNT
Food company making a huge loss on its breadmaking division
Katie Price's divorce
Police obesity
Victoria Coren/David Mitchell engagement
Harry Potter actor getting jailed
The Arch B of C

Quote: David Salisbury @ March 21 2012, 12:29 AM GMT

It seems that EVERYONE has sent in an Ed Milliband office break in sketch same as me (but all with different angles).

View original

I totally missed that story...must have been Paddy's Day or something.

Anyone going tonight?

Yes, I shall be there.

Anyone else?

Dan

I'd like to if anyone's got a spare ticket....

Normally there's tickets being offered on Twitter - but not today. Bugger that means home to do the housework instead. Damn.

Katie Price's divorce

I didn't even realise she'd married again after divorcing that cage fighter bloke. Who's the idiot this time?

That cage fighter bloke. The divorce was only finalised this week.