Bill Jaguar has one willy shorter than the other.

Tuumble fought the Law, and the Law won.

Will Cam bakes his own gingerbread sex dolls, like them bakers in Viz Comic. And, yes, he does dress them up in stockings and f**k them good and proper.

Everyday , john lucas used to steal my dinner money and my packet of KP Skips in the playground

you f**king bastard.

Lofthouse used to sell his ass to his primary school headmaster in return for KP Skips - and lots of them. Even after John Lucas robbed him - he still had f**kin shedloads.

Juan has a pet cheese burger called Roger

Lofthouse has "R" on both his shoes.

Big Jack is just so...

Bill Jaguar is never lost for words

When Tuumble gets an erection he places his penis under a heavy book to make it numb. He prefers having a numb penis so that when he masturbates, he thinks he is wanking someone else off.

Nigel Kelly is Henry Kelly's lovechild with Una Stubbs.

Will Cam plays a starring role as 'Black Sheep' in Sir Cliff Richard's family tree.

Tuumble went out to visit the sea,
Fumbling his keys for all to see,
Bumbling his way, whilst fumbling his keys,
Bumbling his way towards the sea,
Mumbling away, he went to quay beside the sea,

Tuumble fumbled, bumbled and fumbled, bumbled and mumbled did he,
Tuumble fumbled, bumbled and mumbled but forgot to take me

Bill Jaguar wants to be a woman, again.

Big Jack is a woman, again.