I read the news today oh boy! Page 2192

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DaButt

  • Tuesday 21st July 2020, 9:36pm
  • The Lone Star State, United States
  • 13,884 posts
Quote: Chris Hallam @ 21st July 2020, 9:30 PM

This forum is drowning amidst an endless torrent of tedious conservative news commentary.

One man's torrent is another man's dribble; I don't think anyone's shoes are even wet yet.

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Rood Eye

  • Tuesday 21st July 2020, 10:33pm
  • England
  • 4,103 posts

The BBC is paying Zoe Ball £370,000 per year to play records on the radio.

Is she Ken Bruce? No.

Is she Steve Wright? No.

Is she Liza Tarbuck? No.

Given that I'd pay those three marvellous presenters only £37,000 per annum at most, I think Zoe is being treated very well indeed - and with my bloody money! :(

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Chris Hallam

  • Wednesday 22nd July 2020, 6:05am
  • Exeter, United Kingdom
  • 346 posts

Effectively an extension of The Daily Mail:..yawn...
The site is supposed to be about comedy, not promoting a conservative agenda.

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Rood Eye

  • Wednesday 22nd July 2020, 7:34am [Edited]
  • England
  • 4,103 posts

Not a lot of people know this but in New Zealand it's illegal to name a child "Lucifer".

In England, however, it's not illegal and accordingly a couple in Chesterfield were surprised when their local registrar refused to accept "Lucifer" as a name for their new baby.

The good news is that, after some argument, the registrar relented and little Lucifer is now officially a member of Chesterfield Society.

I'm sure a great many people (apart from that registrar) find the name offensive but as Ricky Gervais reminded us only the other day - just because you're offended, it doesn't mean you're right.

Somebody should write a sitcom or a screenplay based on the incident.

"I Love Lucifer"?

You have to admit, it does have a certain ring to it. Laughing out loud

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Rood Eye

  • Wednesday 22nd July 2020, 11:28am
  • England
  • 4,103 posts

In Wrexham, a 47-year-old woman has been found strangled to death on a grassy area in a housing estate.

She was found lying face down on the ground with two dog leads wrapped around her neck.

On the end of each lead was a dog.

The coroner says there are no suspicious circumstances.

PS. If you think I've made that up, you're quite wrong.

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DaButt

  • Wednesday 22nd July 2020, 4:23pm
  • The Lone Star State, United States
  • 13,884 posts
Quote: Chris Hallam @ 22nd July 2020, 6:05 AM

The site is supposed to be about comedy, not promoting a conservative agenda.

Free speech is a cornerstone of our society. The site has a forum named "General Discussion" and inside that is a thread named "I read the news today oh boy!" which, surprisingly enough, is where people discuss news and current events. As you've probably noticed, the news contains an awful lot of political content, so it's only natural for people to discuss it here. Readers are free to lurk silently, participate in the discussion, avoid the thread...or complain about it.

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Sitcomfan64

  • Wednesday 22nd July 2020, 4:26pm
  • England
  • 708 posts

Are people actually wearing masks in shops? Yesterday about half were in my local Tesco. Given it's mandatory from Friday I think we'll be seeing a lot of violence and non compliance. Then again Sainsburys said on social media that they aren't going to enforce the wearing of masks so I have no idea what's going to happen.

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Rood Eye

  • Wednesday 22nd July 2020, 5:03pm [Edited]
  • England
  • 4,103 posts

Gender identity is in the news again as a leading cervical cancer charity has ceased to refer to "women" and has instead begun referring to "people with a cervix".

You can see their point: these days, several people with a cervix do not identify as women and it is considered uncharitable (see what I did there?) to refer to them by that name.

The charity is therefore doing its best to be politically correct and to give offence to nobody.

Unfortunately, a lot of people with a cervix who do identify as women are more than a little offended that the charity has sought to "dehumanise" them by using the new terminology.

Sometimes in life, you can't do right for doing wrong!

It's a funny old world. Laughing out loud

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Firkin

  • Wednesday 22nd July 2020, 5:20pm [Edited]
  • United Kingdom
  • 954 posts

Can't wait to walk down a high street full of masked people, be like an episode of Dr Who.

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DaButt

  • Wednesday 22nd July 2020, 5:45pm
  • The Lone Star State, United States
  • 13,884 posts
Quote: Sitcomfan64 @ 22nd July 2020, 4:26 PM

Are people actually wearing masks in shops? Yesterday about half were in my local Tesco.

I've seen 100% mask-wearing in my recent trips to buy groceries and hardware.

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Rood Eye

  • Wednesday 22nd July 2020, 6:36pm [Edited]
  • England
  • 4,103 posts

Bad news for Jews on Twitter!

The Star of David (in yellow) has been deemed a "hateful image".

Users who have the image as a profile pic have had their accounts locked.

PS. Twitter appears to have been made aware that several demonstrably bona fide pro-Semites are quite fond of the image and take exception to having their accounts locked. Accordingly, I think the image is now being judged on a case-by-case basis.

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Rood Eye

  • Wednesday 22nd July 2020, 8:37pm [Edited]
  • England
  • 4,103 posts

Dogs in Katie Price's household don't have a lot of luck.

Today, her daughter Princess's French Bulldog puppy "Rolo" was found dead by Harvey's carer.

The new puppy had been in the Price household for about a month.

Little Rolo's death (no details of which have been made public) was described as "a tragic accident that nobody could have foreseen".

At the time of the puppy's death, Katie was not at home with Harvey and his carer.

Perhaps Harvey or his carer will supply further details as time goes by?

Strangely, Katie's Alsatian "Sparkle" died violently five months ago when, according to reports, it was hit outside the house by a van.

Even more strangely, in 2018 Katie's dog "Queenie" died violently when, according to reports it was struck outside the house by a delivery van.

Katie currently has another Alsatian, "Blade" who must be absolutely sh*tting himself!

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lofthouse

  • Wednesday 22nd July 2020, 9:42pm
  • Nowhere, England
  • 9,586 posts

F**k me this thread is turning into Heat magazine now

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Rood Eye

  • Wednesday 22nd July 2020, 11:00pm [Edited]
  • England
  • 4,103 posts

The love poem read out by Fergie at Beatrice's wedding recently was by the American E. E. Cummings.

He coined the phrase "The Moon's a Balloon".

Now, however, people are saying the poem should never have been included in the wedding ceremony because Mr Cummings was a racist and a bounder.

If true (which it might very well be), should we be surprised?

He was in his prime a hundred years ago - when almost every white man on earth was a racist and all the very best men (regardless of race) were bounders.

So if anybody doesn't approve of his poetry being read out at Bea's wedding, they can kiss my arse! Laughing out loud

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john tregorran

  • Wednesday 22nd July 2020, 11:09pm
  • mornington,victoria, Australia
  • 1,247 posts

I had a girlfriend who was very keen on his poetry so I pretended to be too.He never seemed to use capitals or full stops.That's it,that's all I remember about his work.