1. Episode One

Wednesday 6^th August 2003

The new series begins with Kurt explaining his theory of 'Ugly Men'. Kurt then suffers from a personal crisis as Liz begins to gossip about what happened after the Christmas party, and Lindsay opens Kurt and Brian's eyes about the gender divide.

2. Episode Two

Wednesday 13^th August 2003

Whilst Brian explores if drinking vodka and tonic, rather than beer, makes a difference to his urinary needs, Lindsay helps Penny to understand what makes her annoying. Although Penny is trying to better herself, Liz and her are still at loggerheads.

3. Episode Three

Wednesday 20^th August 2003

Bob has resorted to sleeping in the gym store room and Brian has to address why his lessons are 'boring', or he will face Mrs Webb.

Kurt can't understand Brian's problems as he has far more pressing issues; a parent of one of his students shows an interest in him, that is, until she smells his breath. Halitosis aside, Kurt decides to quit smoking.

4. Episode Four

Wednesday 27^th August 2003

Whilst Bob moves up the property ladder as he moves a bed and television into his office, Kurt, Brian, Lindsay and Matt pull straws to see who has to address his personal hygiene. Bob takes his relationship with Liz far too seriously, by speaking to Kayla, which has dire consequences.

5. Episode Five

Wednesday 3^rd September 2003

Lindsay is struggling to come to terms with her fast approaching 30th birthday, which she shares with Matt's wife. Whilst Kurt and Brian are convinced that Matt's wife is highly attractive, jealous Penny tells them she is disabled. Penny seeks her revenge with Matt.

6. Episode Six

Wednesday 10^th September 2003

After a record number of staff are off work with stress, Clare assigns the remaining staff 'stress partners'; Matt and Lindsay think they've hit gold when they have to work together. As their friendship grows, Penny gets exceedingly jealous and tells Kurt and Brian that Lindsay is mentally ill; Lindsay and Matt seek revenge in the only way fit.

7. Episode Seven

Wednesday 17^th September 2003

Kurt and Brian have a surprise when a face from the past returns to Summerdown; despite his reservations, Simon finds himself back in the classroom alarmingly quickly.

Simon makes a huge mistake when he tries to help Brian chat up the fit dinner lady, and Kurt makes a life altering bet based on Simon's year travelling.

8. Episode Eight

Wednesday 24^th September 2003

Whilst Simon worries about working with his replacement and wonders why everyone likes him so much, Matt has to step up to the mark to fill Bob's shoes (as it were). The school has a weapons amnesty which leaves the weapons in dangerous hands.

9. Episode Nine

Wednesday 1^st October 2003

Morale is at a low when Clare cancels the Christmas party; this is reinforced when Kurt and Brian receive a card addressed to 'Kurt and Bryony'. Simon's meddling causes massive changes and Kurt and Brian search for new best friends.

10. Episode Ten

Wednesday 8^th October 2003

Carol's baby has an adverse affect on Clare, who begins acting rather oddly; the baby also causes much excitement because no one is brave enough to look at it to see who the father is.

Bob begins to open up to his class and share some of his best kept secrets (much to their disgust), and Kurt carries on worrying if it is possible for him to be the father of Carol's baby (despite the minor issue that they didn't have sex!).

Meanwhile Lindsay is struggling with mixed messages from Clare and has to avoid alcohol for a week or so.

11. Episode Eleven

Wednesday 15^th October 2003

Brian finally finds himself in the first flushes of romance; however, he has no idea how to behave and seeks advice from the worst possible people. Bob misunderstands him and wants to share his love of Wham!

12. Episode Twelve

Wednesday 22^nd October 2003

After a race goes very wrong, Kurt finds himself with a new job and a whole new list of problems, and Brian has to face up to his responsibilities. Despite Kurt's quick discovery that he is healthy, he continues to blame, and relies on, Brian for everything; this is heightened on Sports Day.

13. Episode Thirteen

Tuesday 28^th October 2003

Lindsay and Matt's friendship grows after a drunken kiss; despite avoiding each other and their eternal embarrassment, they cannot keep apart. Lindsay tries to put herself off Matt, by talking about his beautiful wife and listening to his tales about his 'multiple shagging disorder', but nothing works.