What YouTube video are you watching? Page 202

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Michael Monkhouse

  • Tuesday 2nd June 2020, 8:53am [Edited]
  • Eternal City, Italy
  • 5,386 posts

The Spice Girls' iconic comeback single 'Headlines'. It is total and utter f**king shit. How depressing that even the coolest, funniest, sunniest, sassiest, sussiest girls in the biz ultimately degenerated into yet another sad, clich├ęd, sub-Madonna please-pull-your-plonker-cos-mummy-and-daddy-blocked-your-porn-connection-the-bastards spunkfest. You can almost hear their pathetic, weedy little '''''voices''''': 'Please wank to me... PLEASE Sir... Look: I have two titties, just like Katy Perry... Tell me they're not worth a drop of your spunk, Sir. (sob) Tell me you can't eke out a dribble of jizz for old Ginge, Sir.' Girl Power, eh? And the funniest part is that whenever women degrade themselves, it's always men's fault. Women always go on about being the more self-aware, in-control sex, but with shit like this it's always, 'He told me to.' That's the excuse you get from a four-year-old, isn't it? 'Why did you throw stones at my cat?' 'He told me to. He smells of pooh! He not my fwends any more!' 'If he told you to jump off a cliff, would you do that?' 'No, Sir.' 'Why not?' 'Don't know, Sir.'
Melanie C is lucky my love is blind.

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beaky

  • Saturday 6th June 2020, 8:57pm
  • Malaga and Brighton, United Kingdom
  • 2,735 posts

I've been watching old videos of Roxy Music performing live - marvellous stuff, completely out on a limb.

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Michael Monkhouse

  • Sunday 7th June 2020, 8:22am
  • Eternal City, Italy
  • 5,386 posts

Unlike Oscar Pistorius. He's out OF a limb.
How do I do it? What's my secret? I guess we'll never know.

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lofthouse

  • Sunday 7th June 2020, 12:33pm
  • Nowhere, England
  • 9,805 posts

Don't take the piss

He's an angry man

Very angry man!

He'll unscrew one of his legs and twat you with it

(And blame it on burglars)

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Michael Monkhouse

  • Sunday 7th June 2020, 8:29pm [Edited]
  • Eternal City, Italy
  • 5,386 posts

You gotta stand on your own two feet. Unless you're Oscar Pistorius.
Everyone needs legends. Except Oscar Pistorius, he needs leg ends.
Oscar Pistorius got drunk. It was easy, he's half legless already.
What's Oscar Pistorius' least favourite musical? Footloose.
I am so awesome.

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lofthouse

  • Sunday 7th June 2020, 8:43pm
  • Nowhere, England
  • 9,805 posts

I knew 100% he was going to be found guilty

He didn't have a leg to stand on

Etc etc...

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Michael Monkhouse

  • Sunday 7th June 2020, 8:49pm
  • Eternal City, Italy
  • 5,386 posts

Gotta be a McCartney / Heather Mills joke about getting down on one knee...

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Michael Monkhouse

  • Sunday 7th June 2020, 9:36pm
  • Eternal City, Italy
  • 5,386 posts

Trying to think of a cricket joke but I'm stumped.
Trying to think of a Hampton Court joke but it's got a-maze-in'.
Trying to think of a One Direction joke but they're shit.

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George Kaplan

  • Saturday 13th June 2020, 10:51pm
  • England
  • 4,716 posts
Quote: lofthouse @ 13th June 2020, 10:43 PM

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=bHMwhfyUYR4

Mwahaha

Laughing out loud

Lee Mack & ?

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lofthouse

  • Saturday 13th June 2020, 11:12pm
  • Nowhere, England
  • 9,805 posts

Tim Vine !!!