Chin up Teddy, you're already sounding more positive than you were at the start of this process!

And just because you're not being accepted now doesn't mean you won't be accepted in the future. As ever with writing it's on to the next potential thing!

Thanks Ste, but I fear that Carl Cooper who produces the show is not my friend at all.
I once sent him one of my sitcoms, I waited for about three weeks then made the mistake of pressuring him about reading it.

I then may have suggested that he was blaise about working class writers etc
etc.

To cut to the chase it was my standard feeling sorry for myself rant and I got up his nose.

I may even have finished on my standard 'Gang of middle class twats' routine.

Needless to say I would not be surprised if my name wasn't on the BBC blacklist and couldn't rule out my photo being on the inside of the Biscuit cupboard door in the security office at Media City.

The really sad thing is I have learnt nothing from the entire incident!
Well that's not strictly true, I know I was a prat but the waiting time that those with the power insist upon is absolutely f**king head wrecking.
I know they would get f**k all done if the stopped what they were doing every time a muppet emailed them with 6000 pages of shite.

But if they show an interest, then a structured response or ball park date would save so many people from pacing and worrying, it costs nothing and means a lot.

My two for sci fi made it through so I'm feeling pretty

Just need to wait for the news of the final recording now to see if the unnamed one that got in joined them. Then just stick the fees in a high yield account and spend the rest of my life living off the interest.

Quote: Monkeywithtypewriter @ June 12 2013, 11:52 AM BST

My two for sci fi made it through so I'm feeling pretty

Just need to wait for the news of the final recording now to see if the unnamed one that got in joined them. Then just stick the fees in a high yield account and spend the rest of my life living off the interest.

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Two! Well done, which ones were they as I was at the sci fi recording, and I was at this weeks final one too if you care to elaborate on your unnamed sketch that was recorded.

You need to live for the moment instead of saving your hard earned sketch money, I paid to have a tooth removed when I found out I'd got a sketch in, still got change for a backstreet circumcision if I so desire. If I get any more in I'll have to thing about a bollock lift and nipple extenders.

Quote: Teddy Paddalack @ June 12 2013, 11:41 AM BST

Thanks Ste, but I fear that Carl Cooper who produces the show is not my friend at all.
I once sent him one of my sitcoms, I waited for about three weeks then made the mistake of pressuring him about reading it.

I then may have suggested that he was blaise about working class writers etc
etc.

To cut to the chase it was my standard feeling sorry for myself rant and I got up his nose.

I may even have finished on my standard 'Gang of middle class twats' routine.

Needless to say I would not be surprised if my name wasn't on the BBC blacklist and couldn't rule out my photo being on the inside of the Biscuit cupboard door in the security office at Media City.

The really sad thing is I have learnt nothing from the entire incident!
Well that's not strictly true, I know I was a prat but the waiting time that those with the power insist upon is absolutely f**king head wrecking.
I know they would get f**k all done if the stopped what they were doing every time a muppet emailed them with 6000 pages of shite.

But if they show an interest, then a structured response or ball park date would save so many people from pacing and worrying, it costs nothing and means a lot.

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Your post seems to indicate you know exactly why you've not got anywhere with this, insulting someone and pressuring them into reading something before they have time is going to piss anyone off, especially someone who is doing you a favour by doing so. The people I've met don't sound like the kind to hold grudges, but everyone's human, and people seem to forget that when they're submitting stuff to these shows. The waiting time they insist upon isnt some set period of time, its when these people get f**king time to read it. I briefly worked at the old Oxford Road site on TV shows as a runner, and even at that level my days were tough. Multiply that a few times and you've probably got the daily workload of a producer, a workload I'm envious of admittedly, but you still have to empathise.

By all accounts they received a lot of stuff and they do let people know if they like their work; I was contacted after submitting some work to Newsjack once that didnt even get on the recording let alone the show. The producer told me he liked my work and to keep submitting, this kept me going and is the reason I've been able to push myself to carry on submitting and developing. So I understand your need for positive reinforcement, we all need it, but you can't force the issue.

If you're not getting any joy here just change your approach, contact other producers (who you haven't called a middle class twat), and tailor your stuff. Get your sitcom read elsewhere if working producers don't have time, otherwise nowts gonna change.

I am by no means qualified to help you in any way but if you want another set of eyes on your stuff that doesn't come from an angry place I would happily read your work. I'm very raw myself but I think I've got an idea of the tone NJ and SWYW go for, so if you fancy it inbox me and we'll make out by a roaring fire with your work or something.

And you couldn't be more wrong about Mr Cooper being blaise about working class writers...i'm a right trog and he's accepted my submissions, even the ones smeared in own brand margarine.

Thanks Ash - My two were about Mogwai and Clangers respectively. No idea what the kitchen sink one was but the one I'm hoping is two racist guys in a pub having a conversation about immigrants that goes quite far back into history.

All producers will have different views on what makes something funny - I think some have definitely been more appreciative of my stuff than others on Newsjack - but then agian Newsjack is good in that there are two producers and several other writers who might read it so there's a range of tastes.

Quote: Monkeywithtypewriter @ June 12 2013, 2:07 PM BST

Thanks Ash - My two were about Mogwai and Clangers respectively. No idea what the kitchen sink one was but the one I'm hoping is two racist guys in a pub having a conversation about immigrants that goes quite far back into history.

All producers will have different views on what makes something funny - I think some have definitely been more appreciative of my stuff than others on Newsjack - but then agian Newsjack is good in that there are two producers and several other writers who might read it so there's a range of tastes.

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I remember the Mogwai one but four weeks and some considerable sunshine drinking has deleted the memory of how it went down, however that conversation about immigrants going back to the dawn of time was recorded and was brilliant, I absolutely loved it and it got a good reaction I remember. Nice work, it was one of those sketches everyone wishes they'd written, you swine.

Quote: Monkeywithtypewriter @ June 12 2013, 2:07 PM BST

Thanks Ash - My two were about Mogwai and Clangers respectively. No idea what the kitchen sink one was but the one I'm hoping is two racist guys in a pub having a conversation about immigrants that goes quite far back into history.

All producers will have different views on what makes something funny - I think some have definitely been more appreciative of my stuff than others on Newsjack - but then agian Newsjack is good in that there are two producers and several other writers who might read it so there's a range of tastes.

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Ash is right about the immigration sketch.

I recall both mogwai and clangers - pretty certain the clangers one went down very well. The mogwai one went well iirc but I was a bit put off as I think that's one of the sketches I beat to some of the punch... maybe partly as I've wondered before about the mogwai ownership caveats.

Thanksthat's very kind of you to say so. All the ones that got on were those I'd had in my head for ages rather than the many I wrote specifically (which all failed miserably), so going to have to start thinking about next time pretty soon.

Also that one was submitted to a different ex-Newsjack producer for another sketch show and didn't get anywhere, so backs up my point about producers having very different ideas about what is funny.

Ash I accused him of being blaise because it is how I felt, not because he is.
I know I was in the wrong and I have seen my arse because of it because perhaps I could have got somewhere.
But if I had the sense to hold my tongue or to go back and apolgise I would, but I couldn't so I have to have the honesty to admit I f**ked up.
Everyone makes mistakes that's why the put rubbers on the ends of pencils, my rick was to upset someone who could have helped me.

As for your offer that was very good of you, I am not as angry as I sound, I'm just three times more desperate.

Quote: Teddy Paddalack @ June 12 2013, 9:57 AM BST

As for me I have lost hope of meeting any of the Beebs criteria and will opt to eek out out my life as the writer who never was.

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If I had to list my 'top ten funny things' in the last few years none of them would be from the BBC. They tend, at least in recent years, to do vast amounts of 'quite good' but nothing that is 'brilliant'.

So you might well be 'The BBC writer who never was' but that doesn't mean you can't be a good writer.

Thanks Jinky but outside of the BBC I don't know who does radio stuff and there's no way you can jump straight to TV unless you have a note from Matron.

Teddy! Just keep trying to hone your craft.
And think about other outlets

I once wrote on the one shows Facebook page telling them that they were lightweight and should focus on the history of barrels rather than criticising nhs staff. Do you think I'm blacklisted too?

If I see yet another satire about barrel making I shall go mad...