Because not only are we funnier and cleverer then people making TV.
We're also cleverer and funnier than the twunts who write the adverts between them.
Stella.
Because the wife won't beat herself.
B&Q
Because Dexter has the right idea.
McDonalds
Make your way, make your day to the sign that says your welcome. You greasy social reject.
Quote: sootyj @ December 2 2009, 11:54 PM GMTBecause not only are we funnier and cleverer then people making TV.
We're also cleverer and funnier than the twunts who write the adverts between them.Stella.
Because the wife won't beat herself.
F**k it I'll have a go.
Aldi.
Because you know your place.
Mercedes.
Because being a c**t is nothing to be ashamed of.
M&S-for all dyslexic pain lovers
Andrex-because puppies just aren't for Christmas, they're for wiping your arse with.
L'Oreal- Cos you're a dipstick.
Wurther's Original- It's what old men suck to attract young boys.
Nytol.
For when vodka and paracetamol just wasn't quite enough..."
Quote: Tim Walker @ December 3 2009, 12:05 AM GMTNytol...
For when vodka and paracetamol just wasn't quite enough..."
Genius bet they'll use it for real.
Morrisons.
If you buy our shitty pies we'll kill the "stars" in our adverts.
British Gas
We've got the monopoly so pay up.
L'Oreal
Because your worth it...to a minicab rapist.
British Gas - It's what Hitler would have chosen.
Quote: roscoff @ December 3 2009, 12:09 AM GMTBritish Gas - It's what Hitler would have chosen.
British Gas our prices would have made the Holocaust none viable.
KFC
You want our gravy, don't you bitch?
The Harrods Jewellery Department... gifts for the special lady in your life.
The Argos Jewellery Catalogue... gifts for your wife.
Porn -
You don't have to buy it dinner, talk to it or hug it afterwards. You can also shut it off at any time and it won't nag you. If fact, it's great!
Ferrero Roche -
Posh chocks for chavs.
The Big Tin of Cadbury's Roses -
Don't even pretend it's for sharing at Christmas tubbo, you're gonna wolf them bad boys down all on your lonesome.
Caniston Cream -
Because you is a dirty bitch.
Ethnic Style Wooly Hats -
So I can hate you from a distance you c**t, especially when you're holding up the lunchtime supermarket queue by buying a bottle of water and a banana with your cash card, be a shame if you paid for the whopping £1.98 bill with actual money, but no, that would be too easy, you twat.
Maxi Pads -
Stops blood from running down your leg and if you're lucky, keeps it off your knickers as well.
Kinder Surprise.
Yes, it is probably owned by a company which used to fund the Nazis, but it's got a cheap plastic toy inside!
Durex Extra Large.
For when you're feeling aroused and delusional.
Eddie Stobart Lorries.
Proud to be serial killer and rapist-free since 2007.
London Underground -
It's boiling hot, crowded, dirty and over priced. But on rare occassions, some fit young office junior sticks her firm smooth buttocks right into your crotch, I'm talking right in there.
And thanks to the rhythm of the train, you get to legally dry hump some 17 year old and no one says a thing, no one even looks up from their Evening Standards. She won't even complain.
It's great! Don't believe me? Take your Oyster card into a lap dancing club, see how far you get.
Yep, everyone loves riding the tube.
BBC Television -
Putting single mothers in jail since 1956. Pay your license mutha f**kas!
Wetherspoons.
Reassuringly depressive. 