Quote: Renegade Carpark @ May 11 2012, 4:25 PM BST

No Chappers, I am not, I am merely pointing out that someone did something very stupid and has been rewarded for their actions.

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You don't merely point out anything, that's what leads to all this cack; you filter it through your online shock jock persona. (Please let it just be a persona!!)

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ May 11 2012, 4:25 PM BST

The media wouldn't be able to sensationalise it if it didn't happen.

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But they do, if they took another tack, then maybe it would be a different story. So still I would say, attack the way the media reports it. They could make all the difference, but they don't. Attacking the woman will make no difference at all, because there will always be people like that.

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ May 11 2012, 4:22 PM BST

So let that be a lesson to you ladies, if you are the victim of domestic abuse, make sure you are white and photogenic. If you're an overweight Asian woman and you get acid thrown in your face, then forget it, we've already got a pretty blonde model to sympathise over.

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Now come on the police are making a real and concerted effort to deal with honour violence.

It's just unbelievably difficult to deal with elements of a community who are so obdurate. Shelters get infiltrated by women spying for families, taxi drivers work part time as bounty hunters. Or they just bully the woman into going on holiday to some shit hole in Asia and kill her there.
That or they bully an impressionable young son to do the crime, knowing he like most murderers will be out in 15 years or so,

So women stay in these marriages as they literally have no where to go. What's the solution f**k knows?

Personally I think North Koreas got it right. Lock up whole families and make them build shit for the state.

Again though this like most crimes is a minority thing. It's just like food and music communities have their own trends with regards to crime.

Quote: Matthew Stott @ May 11 2012, 4:27 PM BST

You don't merely point out anything, that's what leads to all this cack; you filter it through your online shock jock persona. (Please let it just be a persona!!)

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Ba-what?! I've pointed out loads of stuff - from the media, to the financial cost, to the unwarranted sympathy to the racism. How many more controversial topics do I have to chuck in?

If you want to feel Princess Diana like sympathy towards this woman, then go to town and really enjoy it. Me? I think what's happened is tragic but avoidable and we should not be so quick to beatify this person.

Quote: Chappers @ May 11 2012, 4:13 PM BST

Obviously she's now blind and apart from that handicapm she's going to have untold problems in the rest of her life. Yes - it's Ok to make little jokes but you really are VERY SICK!

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In a crude way RCP has smacked this nail right on the head.

No one is ever judged in this country ever. From people feeding babies pies, to people who allow their pitbulls to eat toddlers and then shit the remains everywhere.

It's never anyone's fault, no one's responsible for them selves (but institutionals can be sued from here to dooms day). And your choice and opinion is sacrosanct.

And it can be seen in a woman who will now cost the state (thats you and me) a fortune in disability payments.

Frankly in days gone by she'd have been given a comfy cage in a freek show with a sign reading "women be aware!"

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ May 11 2012, 4:31 PM BST

Ba-what?! I've pointed out loads of stuff - from the media, to the financial cost, to the unwarranted sympathy to the racism. How many more controversial topics do I have to chuck in?

If you want to feel Princess Diana like sympathy towards this woman, then go to town and really enjoy it. Me? I think what's happened is tragic but avoidable and we should not be so quick to beatify this person.

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It's your attitude to it that is becoming tiresome. Give it a rest for f**ksake.

Yes - I may not have sympathy for some pompous arrogant fox hunter who are really trying to cause damage. This woman stupidly put up with her abuse and now I'm sure she regrets being so stupid.

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ May 11 2012, 4:31 PM BST

Ba-what?! I've pointed out loads of stuff - from the media, to the financial cost, to the unwarranted sympathy to the racism. How many more controversial topics do I have to chuck in?

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You didn't interpret my post properly. What I was driving at was, in one of your replies to me, you put across all your points clearly, calmly and striaght ahead; I could take in and appreaciate what you were getting at. But generally you wade in with phasers set to 'shock', saying things in as over the top manner as possible so it clouds what you're actually trying to say.

Quote: sootyj @ May 11 2012, 4:34 PM BST

No one is ever judged in this country ever.

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Not true, I judge most of you all the time.

Quote: sootyj @ May 11 2012, 4:34 PM BST

In a crude way RCP has smacked this nail right on the head.

No one is ever judged in this country ever. From people feeding babies pies, to people who allow their pitbulls to eat toddlers and then shit the remains everywhere.

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That is very well put sir. There are many cases of domestic abuse where the victim is totally innocent and no collusion is involved and they are the people I give my sympathy too.

But as Matthew Stott quite rightly pointed out, my real anger is with the media and their coverage of this story - oh and the sheep like way people have to express immediate sympathy or they are Satan.

Quote: Matthew Stott @ May 11 2012, 4:39 PM BST

Not true, I judge most of you all the time.

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(and don't diss my extreme writing style - it always gets a reaction)

Abuse is complex.

It's much more about control. Creating a sense of worthlessnes and dependence in the victim.

But this kind of empty sympathy and veneration helps no one, least of all the victim.

nb check out how many literary heroines are trapped in abusive relationships....

Quote: Chappers @ May 11 2012, 4:37 PM BST

It's your attitude to it that is becoming tiresome. Give it a rest for f**ksake.

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I did give it a rest, I wasn't here for two years. But I will take the advice on board - hmmm, Chappers doesn't like my stance on certain things, must do everything I can to conform to his way of thinking - okay, problem solved.

Quote: Chappers @ May 11 2012, 4:37 PM BST

It's your attitude to it that is becoming tiresome. Give it a rest for f**ksake.

Yes - I may not have sympathy for some pompous arrogant fox hunter who are really trying to cause damage. This woman stupidly put up with her abuse and now I'm sure she regrets being so stupid.

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I wonder if anyone pokes her on facebook?

Quote: Matthew Stott @ May 11 2012, 3:17 PM BST

If he's lying, he's lying

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I'm not saying that he's lying about supporting gay marriage, as anyone with half a brain knew all along, I'm saying that he's been lying for the last 5 years by claiming to be against it.

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ May 11 2012, 4:41 PM BST

(and don't diss my extreme writing style - it always gets a reaction)

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What's so good about that though, why is it fun? (Genuine question.) Doesn't it get boring for you too?

Quote: zooo @ May 11 2012, 5:22 PM BST

What's so good about that though, why is it fun? (Genuine question.) Doesn't it get boring for you too?

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It's part of his personality. If people are bored by his abrasive posts, then they're probably bored by your posts about cats and sooty's edited zingers and Charley's anatomical descriptions and we all might as well go home because we're all bored to tears.

As long as people aren't angrily attacking each other I'm perfectly happy with everyone being him/herself. Variety is the spice of life, etc.

I wasn't having a go at him, I'm just interested in what makes people tick. I don't have the 'enjoying getting a reaction' gene, so I was interested in getting it explained.

Whilst the media are crap in covering things like this, saying 'Why didn't she just leave him?' is equally stupid. Ultimately, she is accountable for her actions and not leaving when she had the chance precipitated what happened but women who stay in relationships like that do so because it's a compulsion. I'd bet my life, my house and anything else you want that she has a childhood history of abuse. The cyclical nature of trauma makes it no surprise that she ends up with someone abusive. The media and laypeople (and probably her) call this compulsion 'love' when it is anything but. Poor cow has probably never been shown what love is.

It's much like the 'grooming' story. The media are acting like this is a new development. How did they think pimping worked before? It's the oldest 'profession' on earth, ffs. It's good that it's getting airtime, it's beyond evil preying on damaged and vulnerable people and using their yearning for love and belonging to manipulate them, but it's hardly new is it?