Thynne is still nicking my dinner while I'm on the phone but this time I'm talking to the Laws man*

Did anyone else get the Laws man or was it just a Lincolnshire thing? He was like the milkman but instead of delivering milk he brought round bottles of Coke, lemonade, cheeryade etc

Sarc tried to convinced me he was the love child of the Jelly man, but I can see right through him on that one. Now he's pushing the idea of the Laws man, who sold drugs to kids in Lincolnshire. Well I've checked with my mates in London (and they know everything) and apparently they've never heard of Lincolnshire. Pull the other one Mr Jelly baby.

Nick Nockerty nicked a knickerbocker glory. He held it hostage for a fortnight before violating its globular nay contra-viscous form with a spoon-like weapon. Clearly, cannibalism is a vice shared by mad and mud alike.
He also wears knickers and knockers while kicking nutters in the knackers.

Housemates of Bill Jaguar once found a dress in his wardrobe that he insisted was not his even though it had his name written on the label in biro. Despite his protested innocence of any transvestism Bill payed them £5 each not to tell anyone and promised to destroy the dress.

Definitely Tarby is my friend.

Sarc has the biggest graphite fishing rod collection in his angling club with a total of 23 and once wrote to Jim'll Fix It asking for a ride on a Stingray.

Definitely Tarby was conceived during an arduously lengthy Jimmy Tarbuck set in Bootle. His farther Definitely Not Butter, was named after the lubricant his parents used. His wife is called Definitely Maybe, which keeps Tarby on his toes.

Nick Nockerty holds the kite and tries to fly the string.

"Will Cam" is how his German grandfather use to great everybody. That is until gas emissions, ironically lead to his untimely death.

Nick Nockerty collects bees and also kettle chips that are in the shape of lesser known variety hall performers from the north with his favourite being in the shape of Arthur P. Barnyard, Lancasters second best cheese impersonator and part time donkey shuffler

Sarc was driving the tram which killed Alan Bradley

Paulted is the devil, the necromancer, the one who walks backwards

He also enjoys hiking and collects ornamental frogs

George Martin was the fifth Beatle????? and lofthouse was the sixth Westlife.......

Paulted was the third member of Milli Vanilli

Sarc once dated Chumlee from Pawn Stars and took him to Greggs.