20 SuperKings

INTERIOR-BUSY OFFICE-DAY

OPEN ON:

Dave and Sandra sit facing each other at opposite desks. Dave is talking on his phone as Sandra gets up to leave.

SANDRA

Just nipping over the shop. D’you want anything?

DAVE

(Holding hand over the receiver) Yeah. Can you get me 20 SuperKings?

SANDRA

And if they don’t have them?

DAVE

Erm…I don’t know. Just get anything (goes back to his call).

(Exit Sandra)

CUT TO:

INTERIOR-BUSY OFFICE-DAY

Dave sitting at desk. Enter Sandra carrying a Dolphin which she drops on Dave’s desk.

DAVE

What is this?

SANDRA

Well they didn’t have any SuperKings and you said, “get anything”-

Dave

-Yes. But what is THIS?

(BEAT)

SANDRA

A Dolphin Dave.

DAVE

No Sandra. THIS is a Long-Beaked Common Dolphin. And you know I can’t stand them. JESUS! They’re worse than f**king Marlboro Lights.

SANDRA

Sorry Dave.

DAVE

Twat!

Now THIS I liked!

Cheers. Wasn't too sure about it, to be honest.

Very good, could be a runner this one I could see sandra at the the pub/bar getting the drinks in or at a airport get me something to read for the flight and coming back with 2 little panda bear cubs.Or write a series of 3 and start small and work your way up to the wildlife.
Got loads of potential, well done fella!

Its a bit like the fast show sketch 'Did you get...' 'Even better than that.' But I liked it, you could have a play on words e.g. She comes in with 20 transvestites, 'They didn't have 20 superkings so I got 20 superqueens.'

Got me thinking in more detail-

INT BUSY FOYER OF AIRPORT

OPEN ON:

Dave and Sandra walking through with their small suitcases in tow

Dave : Can you go and get us something to read for the flight Sandra?

Sandra: What do you want?

Dave : Anything its a 50 minute flight so just get what you can

Cut to Sandra coming across the busy foyer with a cute baby panda cub

Dave : What the f?

Sandra: I've messed up again haven't I?

Dave : I would rather have Carole vordamans 101 fun suduku puzzles or take a break.

Sandra: I didn't know!

Dave : What's with all the endangered animals San I've only just got rid of that orangutan you got me when I asked for a vodka and coke at the palais last weekend.

Sandra: I get confused

Dave : munter!

I don't know about a series. It's not much of a surprise after you've seen the first sketch. As soon as you hear Dave say "get anything" it's predictable.

Dave:
Can you get me a.... oh forget it!

She could always get piles - or haemmorhoids (did I spell that rite?). Or Get Carter (DVD) or get lost or real. The possibilities are (almost) endless.

Hey Bobo

It is funny but I recall some Victoria Wood sketch where she says something like 'Get my a strawberry yoghurt/What if they haven't got it?/Get me something else/They didn't have strawberry yoghurt, so I got you a pork pie' and it was all diet-related to so it fitted together better.

All in all a bit unoriginal to me

Dan

I like this one. I like the first one, and ajp's best I think. Might need to reduce it to a 10 pack for filming though.

I liked this, I could predict where it was going though and sometimes that element can ruin a sketch but it was good.

Quote: Daddy Maz @ February 21, 2007, 10:35 PM

Very good, could be a runner this one I could see sandra at the the pub/bar getting the drinks in or at a airport get me something to read for the flight and coming back with 2 little panda bear cubs.Or write a series of 3 and start small and work your way up to the wildlife.
Got loads of potential, well done fella!

View original

Thanks Daddy Maz. Have to agree with ShoePie though, as i see it as more of a one-off sketch. Not sure this 'old cheshnut' of a premiss would stand too many runs out

I liked but definitely as a one-off, as you say, Bobo.

The whole of the chat before could be dropped as it added nothing funny and the missing intro can be surmised from the remaining dialogue.

INTERIOR-BUSY OFFICE-DAY

Dave sits at desk. Enter Sandra, carrying a Dolphin, which she drops on Dave’s desk.

DAVE
What is this?

SANDRA
Well they didn’t have any SuperKings and you said, “get anything”-

Dave
Yes. But what is THIS?

SANDRA
A Dolphin, Dave.

DAVE
No, Sandra. THIS is a Long-Beaked Common Dolphin. And you know I can’t stand them. JESUS! They’re worse than f**king Marlboro Lights.

SANDRA
Sorry Dave.

DAVE
Twat!

Did you do that on porpoise?

Quote: David Chapman @ February 22, 2007, 8:46 PM

Did you do that on porpoise?

View original

That beats the sketch hands down.