Good evening lady and gentlemen. As you are aware I am Sir Spindle Oddblossom, Chairman of the Intergalactic Premier League Football Association and with specific responsibilities for diversity. Now I know what you are all thinking. He was brought up in Bradford so he is doing his best but doesn't know his arse from his elbow and furthermore he has spent about as much time educating himself as you have spent isolated in your own personal vacuums for forty years. I am delighted to say that nothing could be further from the truth, But I am fully aware that when little green pixies with surprisingly excellent footballing skills insisted on invading our teams, not to mention our traditions, it was unacceptable to everybody but only for a while. Then we sniffed their sweat and got the merits of it all, however much that is counter-intuitive.
Yep, so teams that had never won the league before did win and with their inputs but then I myself am married to a pineapple - I suppose I should say female in these strange times - so as my bank assets inflated who was I to question it? Then, of course, they all took us into glory in the cross continental tournament beyond the black holes. Anyway, yes, I know some have two heads, a belly button which drives itself around Jupiter and Venus, and a strange limp but that is in my view a lifestyle choice. As long as they are performing as my bank managers and I personally wish, as the self appointed spokesman for our family galaxy, I wish them well. Because we lay out food for them when they are hungry even if we haven't got a bleeding clue what they are saying. Plus I have personally agreed with my shrink and my succulent wife to stop her from divorcing me that I will no longer shag any green aliens from another planet in the showers.