Quote: zooo @ March 11 2011, 10:51 PM GMT

Maybe one day I'll give Punt and Dennis a threesome.

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Dirty girl.

Hey, who could resist Hugh Dennis? I'm only human.

Funnneeeee! - that was intended for Corey, you know what I mean treacle.

Only joking, jerf.

Angie travelled through time!

My bad!

Zooo, for a geezer that doesn't write comedy and rarely critiques, you aren't half doing well mate

Quote: Jerf Roberwitz @ March 12 2011, 11:38 AM GMT

Zooo, for a geezer that doesn't write comedy and rarely critiques, you aren't half doing well mate

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*shakes head*

Jerf, I'm afraid I didn't find the sketch funny either. I'd echo the comments that there's no subversion at all, or reason to laugh that I can see. Sorry, wish I could be more positve.

How about this one.

The Barmaid Put-down.

Middle aged 'Jack the lad'
"Pint o' lager darlin'"

As barmaid pulls the pint, Jack the lad
lights up big cigar blows smoke her way and says,
"How's about I take you out sometime".

Barmaid, "no thanks, your are too old for me
but you do look like a film star."

Jack the lad puts the cigar in his mouth and says
"Who's that then, George Clooney?"

Barmaid "No, Lassie having a shit"

Rob H, You echo as much like mate, and don't be sorry, I obviously don't write comedy either, but at least I'm trying.

I would like to invite you all to comment on my 'Hippodrome Heights'

Jerf, sorry to go on about this but which radio show rejected your sketch? Knowing this might help us answer the question "why?"

I think I know the reason.
After Cooeeing gently, the irate builder shouts OI CLOTH EARS,COOOEEE
That is the punch line
The bit about the girl with the unfortunate countenance, and the dogs is out
The radio show was Hancocks Half Hour, which was years ago.

The guy wouldn't be allowed to smoke his cigar in the pub - though he would have been when this joke was first doing the rounds.

Is he sure it wasn't rejected from the Goon show too

It is true,I did try to finish with a more modern ending. The original finished with 'How much is that doggy in the window'

I first heard the 'Barmaid' joke in about 1955, in those days smoking was allowed in pubs.

Anything done or said today,has been said and done before. Groucho Marx.

I have 400 posts most of them trying to improve my sketch writing'
This thread has been spoiled by, and I'm sorry to say this but frankly,inane critique, most of the offenders having more posts than a fence around an Australian sheep farm.

Clearly aimed at me, since I've made more posts than I've had hot dinners. I've obviously got your back up by not heaping praise on your sketch, which is entirely understandable.
But I genuinely didn't understand the sketch (along with numerous others) and asked for more explanation, then stated that I still couldn't see the joke. I don't think that qualifies as inane.
You have in fact been quite rude to me, and I don't believe I've been rude to you.
Just saying.

P.S. I don't know if it was one of your 'digs' to keep calling me a geezer, but I'm not one. I've even got boobs and everything.