2 from 'The New Statesman'

Alan B'stard: "It'll cost you"
Other character: "You should have that translated into latin and eblazoned on your family crest."

---------

Mugger: "Wallet!"
B'stard: "Sorry, I don't speak unemployed."

"This week's meeting of the Problem Solving Club will be held in room 26 on the second floor of B block...but you're not allowed to use the stairs."
[/quote]

Great line

Interesting question...that line was written by Chris Langham...any less funny?

I don't think so but its a conundrum I've been juggling for a while...

Alice: You know that stuff they're selling now at the local shop?
Geraldine:Which stuff?
Alice: I Can't Believe It's Not Butter.
Geraldine: yes
Alice: Well, I can't believe it's not butter.
Geraldine: Yeah, well I believe that is the idea, yeah.
Alice:Then yesterday, I went to Crookenden and I bought this other stuff, like a sort of home-brand, you know?
Geraldine: Yes...
Alice: And you know, I can't believe it's not I Can't Believe It's Not Butter
Geraldine: Mmm. I'm losing you now.
Alice: Well, you know I Can't Believe It's Not Butter?
Geraldine: Yeah, you think it is butter.
Alice: No no, I mean you know the stuff that I can't believe is not butter is called I Can't Believe It's Not Butter.
Geraldine: Probably, yeah, yeah<
Alice: Well I can't believe the stuff that is not I Can't Believe It's Not Butter is not I Can't Believe It's Not Butter and I can't believe that both I Can't Believe It's Not Butter and the stuff that I can't believe is not I Can't Believe It's Not Butter are both, in fact, not butter. And I believe they both might be butter, in a cunning disguise. And in fact there's a lot more butter around than we all thought there was.
Geraldine: Yeah. You see, I don't know what you're talking about.

Love it!

Lister: ... down there; where all those people are gathered around that giant pizza.
Kryten: That's not a giant pizza, sir.
Lister: Not a giant pizza?! It's got to be eight foot across. Where do you eat? The Fat Bastard-eria?!

Ted: Now concentrate this time, Dougal. These...
[he points to some plastic cows on the table]
Ted: ...are very small; those...
[pointing at some cows out of the window]
Ted: ...are far away...

Quote: mixmasterfestus @ November 4 2008, 10:55 AM GMT

Interesting question...that line was written by Chris Langham...any less funny?

View original

No.

Quote: Finck @ November 4 2008, 12:05 PM GMT

Ted: Now concentrate this time, Dougal. These...
[he points to some plastic cows on the table]
Ted: ...are very small; those...
[pointing at some cows out of the window]
Ted: ...are far away...

View original

Classic

Father Ted: It was.......Fargo Boyle!

Crowd: Rabble Rabble Rabble Rabble (f**king ell)

^^ My fave Father Ted bit ever ever ever.

Edited by Aaron.

Mr. Brown: "Ali, you can't have two wives."

Ali Nadim: "Why not?"

Mr. Brown: "It's bigamy!"

Ali Nadim: "No, it's big of me!"

What programme is that from, EMS?

Family Guy at the history museum.

Little Peter: Why are all the dinosaurs extinct?

Museum tour guide: Because you touch yourself at night.

Quote: Aaron @ November 4 2008, 6:50 PM GMT

What programme is that from, EMS?

View original

'Mind Your Language' of course!

Ahhhhhh! I should have known! Ace show. Really want to see Series 4 though.