Quote: Reg N @ 21st August 2015, 11:39 PM BSTI went into a bookshop and said to the assistant, "Have you got a book called How to Deal with Disappointment?"
He said "No"
Or, how about...
I went into a bookshop and said to the assistant, "Have you got a book called How to Deal with Disappointment?"
He said, "Yes".
I said, "Oh, I don't need it any more"
I just starting dating this girl who, on the first date, told me she is bi! Great I said, with excitement, I've got no problem with that.
It wasn't until the third date when she flipped and beat up the waiter for bringing the wrong drink that I realised she meant bipolar.
Quote: sootyj @ 22nd August 2015, 4:37 PM BSTNils put up your own blooming jokes!
Nils. There's more than one nil ? Sorry to zero in on this, but that sound a bit naughty. Is it like terrible twos....but sooner ?
I know it's old, but I like it.
Quote: Nil Putters @ 22nd August 2015, 7:51 PM BSTI know it's old, but I like it.
I feel the same way about my cock. (Won a prize at the poultry show)
Q: Do you like Chicken?
A: Yes.
S: Great, suck my cock; It's fowl.
A chicken, a goose and a duck walk into a bar.
They were thrown out for using fowl language.
Quote: Yogi @ 22nd August 2015, 9:43 PM BSTQ: Do you like Chicken?
A: Yes.
S: Great, suck my cock; It's fowl.
This thread is for jokes you made up yourself Yogi. All the rest stay in the graveyard.
Q. Originally, supermarkets sold only which popular foodstuff?
A. Soup.
The clue is in the name.
Quote: Will Cam @ 22nd August 2015, 11:29 PM BSTThis thread is for jokes you made up yourself Yogi. All the rest stay in the graveyard.
How do you know I didn't?
How many goths does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They don't know what light is
Quote: Yogi @ 23rd August 2015, 5:52 AM BSTHow do you know I didn't?
Because, unless you have access to time-travel, you can't write a joke that's older than YOU are.
Quote: Yogi @ 23rd August 2015, 5:52 AM BSTHow do you know I didn't?
Because I remember it from when I was in school circa 1977.
Quote: Yogi @ 22nd August 2015, 6:43 PM BSTI just starting dating this girl who, on the first date, told me she is bi!
Sex symbol Mr Clooney confesses he likes men and women. Bi George!
My sister had an accident with her American boy friend the other day. He asked her to sit on her fanny. She should never have called her pet Porcupine Fanny.
A: You won't find that joke anywhere else.
Q: There's a reason for that.
Quote: Yogi @ 22nd August 2015, 6:43 PM BSTI just starting dating this girl who, on the first date, told me she is bi!
They're ALL bi after a few drinks.