Simon Caine: Every Room Becomes a Panic Room When You Overthink Enough

  • Stand-up
  • 8:35pm (1 hour)
  • 2-6, 8-13, 15-20 & 22-25 Aug 2019
  • Sweet Grassmarket
  • 5 (or Pay What You Want)
Simon Caine.

Show details

Stand-up show starring Simon Caine performed on the following days in August 2019...

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Venue details

18: Sweet Grassmarket


This show operates under the Pay What You Want (PWYW) model. To guarantee entry, buy a ticket in advance. Ticket-holders will be seated first. Any empty seats will then be filled from the free queue and audiences asked to leave a donation at the end.

Loads of male comedians struggle with women, but even more of them struggle to make their problem sound unique. So instead of writing a show about that, Simon has written a show about stories, memories and habits. He also just finished the best comedy course available: an unstable upbringing. 'You're a more authentic John Oliver' (Doug Stanhope). 'What you're doing is great... the problem is nobody understands it' (Iain Coyle, Dave Comedy Commissioner). 'His paranoid persona is immediately entertaining, simultaneously relatable and bizarre' (

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Press coverage

This show's artwork was involved in The Comedy Poster Awards 2019

About the show

The director (John Gordillo) thinks the show is about Simon's relationship with sex, gender and sexuality. Simon (the comedian) thinks it's about social media. Given how quickly Simon checks his phone after he's cum, it could be about both.

Don't want to set your expectations too high but Simon has also just finished the best comedy course available: an unstable upbringing.

This show covers topics including: Disney Princesses impact on mental health, why habits are more important than facts, how anxiety and social pressure will ruin your life if you don't take control of it first, how to ruin a threeway, why you should never ask your therapist out and more (probably, but isn't that enough for you?!)

About the performer

Simon Caine: Sex, Drugs and Other Things I Never Do. Simon Caine.

Simon Caine has been performing stand-up for over 8 years. He's done over 1,400 gigs and has done 2 Edinburgh Fringe solo shows (full runs) as well as 2 subsequent national tours. This will be his third solo show.

Previously he's sold out the Comedy Cafe, The Bill Murray, The Bloomsbury Theatre Studio Space and shows at Reading, Hastings, Leicester, Glasgow, Shaftesbury and many other Fringe Festivals.

Here's a list of awards he's come close to winning: finalist in the Laughing Horse New Act (2014), Reading New Act Competition (2012), You Must Be Joking (2011) as well as a two-time finalist at the London Comedy Store Gong Show.

He was also number 78 in the Guardian's top 100 jokes of the Fringe 2018, but I'm sure you knew that before because everyone reads that whole list.

Quotes from industry / comedians / writers

"You're a more authentic John Oliver" - comedian Doug Stanhope

"That was awesome. I liked it... I don't know why. But it was great. I'll have you back" - Mike Manera (Piccadilly Comedy Club)

"What you're doing is great... the problem is nobody understands it." - Iain Coyle (Dave / UKTV Comedy Commissioner)

Review this show

Have something to say about this show? You will be able to give this show a star rating (and write a short review if you want) from the 2 August.