The London Olympics is going to be the first Olympics...

to be watched by my dad from heaven.

People always seem to forget the true meaning of Easter..
that is it's an annual Christian festival in commemoration of the resurrection of Jesus Christ, observed on the first Sunday after the first full moon after the vernal equinox, as calculated according to tables based in Western churches on the Gregorian calendar and in Orthodox churches on the Julian calendar.

Snappy!

The most interesting thing about Tigers is still pretty underwhelming.

I don't watch Doctor Who anymore...

Well you know what they say about Coffee tables...

I wouldn't say I'm fastidious about Hygene but...

I like to be ahead of the game..

I didn't hear the question properly, I thought...

I've started a new Fitness regime...

Everyone says I'm too nice...

I'm definitely getting better with Technology...

The best thing about London Transport is..

I've started a new fitness regime... I get out of bed before lunchtime.

Quote: Steve Sunshine @ August 29 2011, 9:52 PM BST

I don't watch Doctor Who anymore...

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I don't have the time, Lord.

Quote: Steve Sunshine @ August 29 2011, 9:52 PM BST

I don't watch Doctor Who anymore...

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... although I don't watch it any less either.

Quote: Steve Sunshine @ August 29 2011, 9:52 PM BST

The best thing about London Transport is..

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... the rest of the Londoners can use the other ports without having to assiciate with trannies.

Quote: Steve Sunshine @ August 29 2011, 9:52 PM BST

The best thing about London Transport is..

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..it stays in London.

Quote: Steve Sunshine @ August 29 2011, 9:52 PM BST

I don't watch Doctor Who anymore...I'm sick of living in the past.

Well you know what they say about Coffee tables...the glass ones Kenco to hell.

I wouldn't say I'm fastidious about Hygene but...I soak my Wet Wipes in Dettol just to be sure.

I didn't hear the question properly, I thought...you said 'fancy a shag'

I've started a new Fitness regime...anyone who tries to make me exercise gets beheaded.

I'm definitely getting better with Technology...I've recently learned how use messin

The best thing about London Transport is..it's an opportunity to read a whole book before I get to work.

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Hahaha
Good stuff all round.
& As it's my thread, I'm allowed to steal any of them.
Bloomin small print

I don't watch Doctor Who anymore... And, on a completely unrelated matter, I'm no longer a virgin.

I wouldn't say I'm fastidious about Hygene but... sharing a bath with the dog saves using a flannel.

I didn't hear the question properly, I thought... 'How do you plead?' I thought the judge meant it 'hypothetically.'

I've started a new Fitness regime... I now hold a cigarette in each hand.

Everyone says I'm too nice... They're the voodoo dolls I leave untouched.

I'm definitely getting better with Technology... In 2075 I invented The Time Machine.
[/quote]

I don't watch Doctor Who anymore... it's shit.

Well you know what they say about Coffee tables... if you can't beat them, join them.

I wouldn't say I'm fastidious about Hygene but... I fashioned all my furniture out of ear wax.

I like to be ahead of the game.. then hit him with a stone cold stunner.

I didn't hear the question properly, I thought... you asked if your boobs look big in this.

I've started a new Fitness regime... beating up Triple H.

Everyone says I'm too nice... so I murdered them.

I'm definitely getting better with Technology... the other day I bashed an i-phone in with a stick.

The best thing about London Transport is.. I have a death star.

There are three golden rules for a happy marriage...BUT IT'S EASIER TO DROWN THE BITCH

Obama edges closer to his dream of free health cover for all. HE'S KILLED ALL AMERICANS

I never realised that I was priveleged until.......I MET MY COUSIN TOMMY C*NTFUCKER

Yes we're a close family.....JAMIES FOSTER PARENTS ONLY LIVE AT NUMBER 37

So I picked my numbers, filled in my ticket and...THOUGHT I AM SO HAPPY I HAVE'NT GOT TO WRITE COMEDIC MATERIAL ABOUT THIS

Cook along with Jamie on your mobile phone.....WELL IT'S THAT OR HAVE HIM NEXT TO YOU, WHAT NUMBER DO I RING?

I'd never seen anyone quite that good looking......THEN I UTTERED THE WORDS "HELLO AGAIN,NAN"

Next weeks episode Doctor Who and the....BATTLE AGAINST HAVING A LIFE

Of course I like the Soaps...I'M THICK

There are two types of Men...THOSE WHO ARE ONLY INTERESTED IN WOMEN FOR......SORRY I CANT CONCENTRATE YOU HAVE BEUTIFUL TITS

My favourite game when I was growing up was...KICK THE CAN ADIAN

It's called my Family nowadays, but it's working title was.....THE LOST RUBBER

This thread won't work because..IT'S BEEN MOVED TO THE CHRIS ADDISON BEST JOKES SECTION

Quote: Lee Henman @ September 1 2011, 10:25 PM BST

I've started a new Fitness regime...it's called the Adam Ant Diet. Don't chew ever...don't chew ever...

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