Here's one I found in an old file under my bed. It's an interview between a man who talks in spoonerisms and another who uses malapropisms
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“Well mister Smith, that remains a bowl of contention” he said.
I looked him squarely in the eye and asked:
“But did you not gust a butt to expose his lack of pies?”
“His lack of pies were not geranium to the tissue”.
“Well had it been me I’d have searched lie and hoe and left no turn un-stoned” I insisted.
“No turn un-stoned” he mused.
“Now that remains me of the time I spent abroad a chip. I was the enteritis massager” he smiled.
“Well I never” I replied. “Then I simply must tell you about the time I met Polly Darton aboard the EQ2. She was bop of the till”
“Ah yes she’s the one famous for having had all the sarcastic purgery?”
“Yes that’s the one. She’s also famous for singing bad salads” I said.
“Ah yes the well known springer. I know her" He seemed deep in thought for a moment and then said:
"I went on a cruise once to Algiers you know? Spent a lot of time at the cash bar”
I thought that we were getting off the point by this stage.
“You know talking about old Polly and pop of the tops and all that. Do you think I could be the Jan for your mob? Do you think I could be your wumber nun?” I asked him, steering the conversation back to the hatter in mand.
“Well you know Mr Smith, what you’re porpoiseing is by no mans a damp squid. I can see you in my origami-nation as the head of Humour Discourses. I’d like to offer you a cataract if you’re wailing”
“Excellent I’ll me you Sunday”
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