Feedback please - The Pilgrim's Rest Page 2

Thanks Gappy, like the change to the protesters, that may work better.

Regarding your changes, that's not far off what actually exists in the other 23pgs of the script. There is a burger van which is also a kind of knocking shop, the former manager lives behind the service station in a makeshift camp after having a nervous breakdown, an obnoxious and lazy chef, and there is also the main service station manager who is the antagonist of the show. They all form a service station collective with main story arcs and subplots happening between them all.

Making the service station a new venture is a great idea, I'll have to think out how that would work. Writing for radio would be interesting, might give that a go anyway for some experience.

The good thing about writing for audio is that your don't have any budgetary constraints for your flights of comic fancy (unless you want a cast of 50, one of whom has to be played by Sir Ian McKellern, or somethign); the bad thing is that there's only one station in the whole of the UK who wil make it, so the chances are so near zero as to be irrelevent : )

Quote: Shintree @ 31st May 2014, 11:28 AM BST

Thanks Gappy, like the change to the protesters, that may work better.

Regarding your changes, that's not far off what actually exists in the other 23pgs of the script. There is a burger van which is also a kind of knocking shop, the former manager lives behind the service station in a makeshift camp after having a nervous breakdown, an obnoxious and lazy chef, and there is also the main service station manager who is the antagonist of the show. They all form a service station collective with main story arcs and subplots happening between them all.

Making the service station a new venture is a great idea, I'll have to think out how that would work. Writing for radio would be interesting, might give that a go anyway for some experience.

I'd really put it aside, I know it is an itch you want to scratch. But start from scratch with another and come back to this one in a month or two. It will give you perspective. But if you are having fun. Nothing wrong with that.

Sage advice. As I mentioned, I have something else in development now (with a co-writer this time) and seeing as I have the attention span of a gnat, I can't do both anyway. Will revise once I get some BBC feedback (whenever that is).

Good man :)