Hello again, I'm feverishly working on this script (a 3rd of the way through episode one). Please read and give honest feedback, if you would be so kind.
SCENE 8: EXT.DAY, UP A SIDE STREET
DEREK IS TRYING TO MOVE THE DEAD THIEF ACROSS THE STREET TO AN ALLEYWAY. HE IS SPOTTED BY TWO YOUNG GIRLS WHO LOOK AGHAST.
Derek:
He’d be rubbish in that Strictly Come dancing wouldn’t he?
HE ADDRESSES THE CORPSE
Derek:
You’re too stiff aren’t you!
HE BREAKS INTO A HAMMY RENDITION OF ‘THE BLUE DANUBE’ BY STRAUSS AS HE WALTZES THE THIEF ACROSS THE ROAD, FOLLOWED BY THE QUIZZICAL EYES OF THE CHILDREN.
Child (to other child):
I thought they usually do more Latin or contemporary routines on Strictly Come Dancing?
Other child:
And I’ve never seen anyone dancing in heavy boots and no trousers.
CUT
SCENE 9: EXT. DAY IN A DARK ALLEYWAY
DEREK IS SWAPPING CLOTHES WITH THE DEAD MAN. HE TAKES THE MAN’S PHONE AND BROWSES HIS CONTACTS. THE FIRST IS SOMEONE CALLED BARKLEY’S BARRY (WHO LATER TURNS OUT TO BE THE SECURITY GUARD WHO SHIELDS HIM). HE PLACES THE PHONE IN THE POCKET OF HIS NEW REEFER JACKET. AS HE IS PULLING TROUSERS ONTO THE DEAD MAN, A BUSINESS WOMAN WALKS PAST. FROM THE REAR, IT LOOKS TO HER LIKE HE IS ENGAGING IN AN EXTREMELY LEWD ACT. SHE STOPS DEAD AND COCKS HER HEAD.
Derek:
Live and let live, love!
The woman scurries off and a rat scurries through the alleyway.
SCENE 10: EXT. DAY. SIDE STREET
NOW THEY HAVE SWAPPED CLOTHES AND PERSONAL EFFECTS, DEREK IS WALTZING THE BODY BACK BY THE CAR, SO HE CAN REST HIM AGAINST A LAMPPOST. THE YOUNG GIRLS LOOK UP FROM LOOKING AT SOMETHING FUNNY ON ONE OF THEIR MOBILES.
Derek:
We still need a lot more practice, don’t we darling. (In a ventriloquist’s voice) Yes, we do!
CUT TO DEREK PLACING THE BODY IN A SITTING POSITION. HE CHECKS ALL AROUND HIM FOR CCTV CAMERA. WHATEVER CAMERRAS THERE ARE ARE FACING THE OPPOSITE DIRECTION. HE GOES TO A PHONE BOX AND DIALS 999.
Voice on the phone:
Emergency services, which service do you require?
Derek:
Police, I mean ambulance..there’s a man, I think he’s dead..
Voice on the phone:
And your name is?
DEREK TAKES OUT A CREDIT CARD FROM HIS NEW WALLET AND READS FROM IT
Derek:
Mr. Ray W. Savage.
FADE TO BLACK