TOPICAL SKETCH. DOES IT WORK?

GORDON BROWN IS TALKING TO A LOAN SHARK (J).

Gordon
Hello, are you a loan shark?

J
Who's asking?

Gordon
Me.

J
Are you jesting me? Who are you?

Gordon
Gordon Brown. I'm in debt, I need money.

J
Right how much do you need? A ton? £250?

Gordon
Erm….

J
Come on man I haven't got all day. How much do you want?

Gordon
£1.5 trillion.

J
F**k me!

Gordon
No thanks. The wife wouldn't be happy.

J
Man, you are in some serious shit.

Gordon
I know. I borrowed a bit too much. Thought I could handle my finances but obviously not.

J
Have you tried consolidating your loans into one lower monthly debt? I mean it'd be easier, innit?

Gordon
I've already tried. They won't let me. Anyway, can you get me the money or not?

J
I'm not sure man. Wait a sec.

J GETS OUT HIS PHONE.

J (ON PHONE)
Hello, Allen Stanford? You got any money?