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Random 8

Michael Akadiri

Michael Akadiri

One random comedian, eight random questions; it's the ultimate test of funny person and fate. This week's guest is the medical mirth-inducer Michael Akadiri, who's currently on tour with the show No Scrubs. How has Doc Michael found the national temperature, so far?

"Performing No Scrubs around the country has truly been magnificent!" says Akadiri. "Fortunately, in my career to date, I've had the pleasure of gigging at clubs up and down these shores. But to have people come out to specifically see you, spending their time and evening, in this economy? I'm honestly grateful."

Speaking of time management, is he combining the tour shows with the day job, somehow?

"I'm currently on a sabbatical from the day job," he says, "but I am combining touring with a newborn, so there's that!"

No sleeps either then. Michael Akadiri, your Random 8 await.

Michael Akadiri. Copyright: Garry Carbon

What was your childhood career dream?

Footballer. Like every young boy who grew up in South London, the dream was to play for Manchester United. Our local team. I accepted that it wasn't going to happen when I was 15, fighting relegation in the third division of my Youth Football League.

So naturally, my son has commenced Project Mbappe...

Your most interesting injury?

I was in the gym, think I was doing incline bench press with dumbbells, and I was a bit lackadaisical as I dropped the weights post-set that I didn't see another set of dumbbells already on the floor.

More fool me as I crushed my middle finger between the two dumbells, breaking the tip of my finger (distal phalanx for those medically inclined). I knew it was broken as I saw the bone sticking out, waving hello at me.

The Nurse Practitioner who stitched me up was lovely but it was agonising sitting in that A&E waiting room for hours. I definitely don't like the taste of my own medicine!

Is there a book or film that changed your life?

Rush Hour. Pure hilarity.

It's not an easy feat but they somehow make racism funny. We've now got campaigns, Stop Asian Hate and Black Lives Matter, but the gloves were off in those films. What's more, the two screenwriters are two white guys. They must've had a ball writing those jokes. Knowing that they'd be shielded from any backlash.

I can't lie, everytime there's a clip from the film that gets posted on Twitter, I belly laugh! One of the best.

What should be Britain's next national anthem, and why?

Giggs - Talking Da' Hardest.

God has DONE SAVED the Monarchy. Charles was born into a multimillion pound dynasty. Enough of all that. I'd rather sing an anthem that gets you GASSED. Talking Da' Hardest makes you wanna slap your dad and stunner your mum.

(For avoidance of doubt, that is obviously a joke. It just makes you wanna slap your dad! Which I've never done... As I value my life.)

BBC New Comedy Awards. Michael Akadiri. Copyright: Phil McIntyre Entertainment

Ever met a particularly great or awful famous person?

Well, I met a well-known TV presenter for a pilot and they were absolutely lovely, very personable and charming.

However, I've since seen their social media output and they come across as a bit of an irritant d*ck.

This leaves me conflicted. Should I take them as I met them in the real world? Or should I take them as they're choosing to portray themselves to the world?

The best thing you've ever bought a ticket for?

Probably my plane ticket to LA some years ago. A few friends and I explored a bit of the West Coast, well I say coast but it was predominantly LA and Vegas.

It's hard to beat a group of mates spending everyday overeating, overdrinking (responsibly) and gorgeous weather.

Being a bit older with our lives going in different directions, unlikely we'd find the time or money to run it back so I definitely cherish the time we had out there.

Michael Akadiri

What's the weirdest thing in your wardrobe?

I've got a t-shirt which, using the periodic table, says "F*ck B*tches, Get Money." It'd probably be too nerdy for Sheldon Cooper. Fortunately, I've had the wherewithal to have never worn it publicly. People would think I'm some dorky Andrew Tate stan.

When starting out in comedy, I had an idea for a character called MC Kemicalz (the alias for my short lived grime career) where he'd try to balance being nerdy and geeky in real life with being this hard and aggressive rapper.

Unlike a chemical experiment, the idea never combusted...

Who are you most envious of?

I'm a comedian - I'm envious of anyone doing better than me!

But in all seriousness, anyone that can make a sustainable living off comedy gets my utmost respect. There's no guarantees in this game - you can be here today and gone tomorrow.

If we do another Q&A in 10 years and I'm still relevant as a comedian - I would've surpassed my expectations!


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