- Friday 11th March 2016, 9:13am [Edited]
- Nottingham, England
- 1,917 posts
I submitted this to 'News Thump' but it did not get used - so I thought I would post here. Any critique would be most helpful/welcome.
DAVID IKE CLAIMS LEICESTER CITY COULD WIN PREMIERSHIP!
Crazy purple shell suited David Ike is at it again. Yesterday he astounded the footballing world when he claimed his old team Leicester City might actually win the premiership.
This claim is even more astounding when you consider that the clubs highest ever league finish was second place in the 1928-29 season. Well known ex Leicester City and England player Garry Linaker said, I might wear blue blinkers and have ears like the FA cup but even I wouldn't dare to think a little club like Leicester stood a chance of finishing top of the Premiership.
The self-proclaimed 'son of god' made his fantastic prediction at the launch of his new book, in which he claims that not only is the Queen a shape shifting lizard, but that prince's Harry and William are interdimensional rabbits, and Prince Philip is a racist Bigot.
An FA spokesman said they get all sorts of crazy predictions about who will win the premiership but this one was one of the craziest he had ever heard. After checking that Leicester City were actually in the Premiership he said, "Leicester to win the Premiership? Let's see what Chelsea, Man U and Liverpool would have to say about that!" When asked where Leicester was he said he thought they were in the North somewhere or possibly in Norfolk.
Loveable Leicester City Manager Claudio Ranieri refused to comment on Ike's amazing claim, and went on to talk about football in such a nice gentle way with his soft engaging Italian accent that our reporter fell asleep...