Newspaper Sketch

TWO MEN ARE SAT IN A CAFE,ONE IS READING A NEWSPAPER.

1ST MAN: Says here Prince Edward given stick for beating dogs.

2nd MAN: Bloody typical royatly,get given everything..

1st MAN: Gazas' bombed.

2nd MAN: That blokes always pissed.

1st Man: Lord Madelson's buying TV's for the House of Commons.

2nd MAN: Wouldn't it be cheaper if his boyfriend wore a dress?

1st MAN: Barrack Obama?

2nd MAN: I'd rather heckle Brown.

1st MAN: Down in Devon,they're looking for an expert on six stone beavers.

2nd MAN: Dawn French.Shes the only one I can think of with a six stone
beaver.

1st MAN: Job prospects look gloomly.

2nd MAN: Terrible,look at the thousand poor sods who've just got a job in
Poundland.

1st MAN: Beers a pound a pint.

2nd MAN: So how come it cost some much before?

1st MAN: Tea?

2nd MAN: Whats wrong with that?

1st MAN: Nothing,do you want a tea?

2nd MAN: Why not.Can I have a look at your paper?

END

The pace is astonishing, I kinda looked at this sketch and knew I'd like it.

Quite 2 Ronnies, maybe needs one more line, jsut to make it clear how silly this guy asking for a paper he knows everything about is.

Thanks Stooty,I've got a pile of one liner things from last weeks papers and didn't know what to do with them.

Quote: steve @ January 2 2009, 5:00 PM GMT

Newspaper Sketch

1st Man: Lord Madelson's buying TV's for the House of Commons.

2nd MAN: Wouldn't it be cheaper if his boyfriend wore a dress?

View original

Really like that line!

Great sketch.

I was just thinking of cutting some out of this and adding something new,and maybe sending it off to Newsrevue,could use it as a bit of a runner,one sketch for the mid week papers another for the weekend papers.Any thoughts?

Could work but usually they'd want you to tie it ore firmly to one story.

As a runner I'd break it up into 3-4 interactions and send them.

Quote: steve @ January 2 2009, 5:00 PM GMT

1ST MAN: Says here Prince Edward given stick for beating dogs.

2nd MAN: Bloody typical royatly,get given everything..

1st MAN: Gazas' bombed.

2nd MAN: That blokes always pissed.

D

View original

Really enjoyed them two lines the most.

With a little adaptation these could make good 118118 gags.