2525: Brain And The Basin

EDIT TITLE *BRIAN AND THE BASIN*

Just one of the sketches I'm going to enter for the uncommissioned writing consideration, any feedback appreciated and well, I hope it makes you at least crack a smile...

EDIT: After thinking about this for a bit, I've decided just to take this down, at least until hear a yay or nay when I submit this, but again thanks for all the comments and critique.

Really like the idea and think it works very well. It has the potential for a series of sketches.

I like the idea of a malicious basin, but it takes quite a while to realise why he's bring malicious. I think you should reveal it a bit earlier and then move on to his revenge with a few more gags. Also, cut the swearing out as Radio 4 aren't swear friendly.

That's very nice Sam, needs reigning in a bit for the audience though.

Excellent but you need a better intro and conclusion.

But funny, good characters and an astonishingly good idea.

2525, seems to be bringing out some tip top writing.

Thanks for the feedback guys, I've down a revision to cut down the language and have changed a few lines here and there. I decided not to alter the form.