The nosebleed epidemic worsens. Geoff and Brian bury Mike alive. Tubbs and Edward leave the local shop to find a 'no-tail' for David. Pauline is pushed to the limit. Les McQueen is astonished that Creme Brulee have reformed without him.

The awful ordeal at the Job Centre continues. Pauline is holding Ross hostage but no one has noticed. All Mickey wants is a tuna sandwich. Or a fire engine!

Faded Seventies rocker Les McQueen discovers his old band, Creme Brulee (Eurovision contenders, don't you know), have reunited... but without him. Lead singer Tony Cluedo doesn't hesitate to take Les's savings, but fails to live up to his promise of welcoming Les back into the band with open arms.

Edward and Tubbs venture down from the shop to the supermarket. But this is no ordinary shopping trip - they are shopping for a no-tail (wife) for David.

Maurice arrives at the butchers shop, panicking about health inspections. What exactly is the nosebleed epidemic sweeping Royston Vasey? And why are Maurice's wife's sandwiches at the booth suddenly a must-have snack?