One of the biggest challenges Keith faces in his new life with no alcohol is socialising without a drink. So his friend Richard suggests sending some smutty text messages to remind himself he's still "one of the lads". Unfortunately, Keith accidentally sends an obscene comment intended for Anita to the one person at his AA meetings that he is trying to befriend.

At Tom's football match Keith cannot help but compare himself to the other fathers. Feeling inadequate, he embarks on a new quest to recover his masculinity.

Anita and Keith are trying to have a nice, civil, drink-free meal with their friends, Drew and Rachel. Whilst being distracted by his nose hair, Keith misses most of the evening and, upon his return, he is annoyed that Anita has lent Rachel their iron.

At the AA group, meanwhile, Keith identifies with fellow member Janice on how hard it is to socialise without alcohol. Keith feels he can communicate with her and asks for her number, but is put out when she doesn't ask for his number in return.

Richard and Keith are messing around with Richard's new phone in the coffee shop and, to help recover their youthful, laddish, drunken behaviour, they decide to send each other obscene text messages. What will happen, however, when Keith sends an x-rated text to every number listed in his phone?

Back at the AA group, Janice is disturbed when she receives a dirty text from an unknown number - can Keith persuade her not to go to the police?

Elsewhere, Anita is annoyed that Keith had sent Rachel the text. He decides to come clean to Richard, but will this be the end of another friendship and will Keith get his iron back?