Mongrels. Image shows from L to R: Destiny, Nelson, Kali, Marion, Vince. Copyright: BBC.


BBC Three sitcom. 17 episodes (pilot + 2 series), 2010 - 2011. Stars Tony Way, Rufus Jones, Lucy Montgomery, Katy Brand, Dan Tetsell, Paul Kaye, Ruth Bratt and Felix Dexter.

Series 1, Episode 4 - Nelson The Stroke Virgin

Destiny enjoys a taste of life in the limelight after being awarded Animal of Courage 2010, but it is Marion who is the real hero. Nelson tries to be stroked by a human and Kali develops a crush on a crow that turns out to be female.

Further details

Mongrels. Destiny. Copyright: BBC.

Afghan hound Destiny enjoys a taste of life in the limelight after being awarded Animal of Courage 2010.

However, there is tension in the yard as Marion is the true hero, but Destiny, dazzled by the attention, refuses to come clean. Everything soon backfires though and she is forced to redeem herself.

Meanwhile, urban fox Nelson is on a mission to experience being stroked by a human. However, when he finds himself trapped in the local petting zoo, the experience is less than enjoyable and he resorts to calling on Destiny to save him.

Pigeon Kali develops a crush on a crow only to discover the buff new boy in town is, in fact, a girl who soon develops a crush on Kali, leaving her momentarily questioning her sexuality.

Song: Everybody Loves A Lesbian - Sung by the Female Crow, featuring Kali and Destiny.
Written by Danielle Ward and Adam Miller.


Some sources give this episode the unofficial title Never Been Stroked.

Broadcast details

Tuesday 13th July 2010
BBC Three
30 minutes


    Cast & crew

    Regular cast
    Tony Way Gary
    Rufus Jones Nelson (Voice)
    Lucy Montgomery Destiny (Voice)
    Katy Brand Kali (Voice)
    Dan Tetsell Marion (Voice)
    Paul Kaye Vince (Voice)
    Guest cast
    Margaret Cabourn-Smith Mother
    Malcolm Rogers Old Man
    Dan Skinner (as Renton Skinner) Reporter
    Andrew Brooke Farmhand
    Velile Tshabalala Nurse
    Lewis Macleod Ensemble (Various Roles) (Voice)
    Jeff Brazier Self
    Clive Anderson Self
    Ruth Bratt Cassandra (Voice)
    Writing team
    Jon Brown Writer
    Paul Doolan Writer (Additional Material)
    Dan Tetsell Writer (Additional Material)
    Danielle Ward Writer (Additional Material)
    Paul Mayhew-Archer Script Editor
    Production team
    Adam Miller Director
    Stephen McCrum Producer
    Mark Freeland Executive Producer
    Nigel Williams Editor
    Simon Rogers Production Designer
    Joe Henson Composer
    Richie Webb Composer


    Everybody loves a lesbian

    A song about lesbians. Warning: this clip is not suitable for young viewers or those easily offended.

    Featuring: Lucy Montgomery (Destiny), Katy Brand (Kali).

    Animal of Courage

    Destiny is up for an "Animal of Courage" award.

    Featuring: Lucy Montgomery (Destiny), Dan Tetsell (Marion), Tony Way (Gary), Jeff Brazier.

    Destiny The Lifesaver

    A young boy is drowning and it is up to Destiny to save him, but she has a Magnum Classic to finish.

    Featuring: Dan Tetsell (Marion), Paul Kaye (Vince), Margaret Cabourn-Smith (Mother).

    Clive Anderson on Mongrels

    Nelson spends the night in a petting zoo after being desperate to be stroked. However, during the night he finds an unwanted visitor in his pen, in the form of Clive Anderson.

    Featuring: Rufus Jones (Nelson), Clive Anderson.

    Never Been Stroked

    It turns out Nelson has never been stroked.

    Featuring: Rufus Jones (Nelson), Lucy Montgomery (Destiny), Katy Brand (Kali).


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