Carol E Wyer interview

Carol E Wyer

BCG chats to author Carol E Wyer to find out why she has been hanging around expensive car showrooms recently, which joke it is that always makes her snort with laughter, and why it helps to be an older stand-up comic...

Hi Carol. Could we start by asking you to introduce yourself...

Hi. I'm a humorous writer, blogger and stand-up comedian who sets out to encourage people to age disgracefully, enjoy life and seize opportunities. That sounds dreadfully pompous now it's written down so, in a nutshell, 'I like making people laugh'.

What's your new book - 'Life Swap' - about?

It's tricky to tell you without revealing the incredible twist that is astounding reviewers, but suffice to say it is a funny feel-good story about people swapping lives for what they assume will be better ones.

Have you ever felt that your life was so dull, bad, or so miserable that you'd swap it? Or, have you ever looked longingly at someone else's life and thought "if only"? If those thoughts have crossed your mind then read the book. It'll amuse and surprise you.

Life Swap by Carol E Wyer

Your character Polly starts the book with a few problems. Hopefully she is not based on anyone you know in real life?

Polly is actually one of the few characters who is not based on someone I know. I have been known to write about people I know in real life; including my post lady (in Just Add Spice, she ended up being featured in a newspaper thanks to the book), a parrot called Bert (in Three Little Birds - he also was interviewed for a newspaper article!), and my mother, who was the inspiration for the madcap party-loving mother in the first two novels I wrote. I should point out I did ask everyone's permission before I wrote them into the books.

In Life Swap, there's only one "real" character and he's right at the end of the book - Alfred. I'm an observer of life and much of my material, like a lot of comedy material, comes from real-life and seeing the ridiculous in situations. I warn friends to never tell me anything because if it's funny enough or interesting, it'll end up in one of my books!

You do a lot of research for your books. For 'Life Swap', you must have visited some car showrooms then?

Yes, I hung out at several showrooms and, while Hubby was tyre-kicking, I chatted to the salesmen. I found one salesman in particular who had been selling cars all his life and he helped me such a lot.

I favoured lurking about a local Mercedes showroom because we could get free tea, coffee and biscuits while we looked about (us old pensioners like a bit of free stuff). Poor old hubby was worried that I'd end up buying a car. I have a penchant for very fast sportscars and so he walked about clutching his wallet in case I raced off with his credit card.

You also had a go at being a living statue we understand. How did that go?

In a nutshell - badly. Like Polly, I was supposed to be an angel. I discovered I can't stand still for even five minutes and I kept trying to crane my neck about to see what was going on. I got frustrated at people ignoring me and gave up after half an hour. Apart from anything else, I felt totally stupid. I'd rather stand at the front of a stage doing a comedy routine any day.

'Life Swap' is your ninth humorous book. Could you tell us a little about why you write humour?

There's a lonely army child who has to wear ridiculous glasses (way before Harry Potter made them fashionable), has long plaited pigtails and who speaks in a plummy accent that makes Miranda Hart sound common. She struggles to make friends as she moves from school to school. Most poke fun of her with her daft hairstyle, sensible Clarks shoes and specs. Some even try to bash her accent out of her by banging her head against a brick wall. Just when she thinks she's reached rock bottom and hates her life, she manages to smash her front teeth out and has to have false teeth - tough going for a child about to hit puberty - especially as these teeth are loose and bounce up and down in her mouth when she speaks.

Carol E Wyer

Anyway, her mum and grandfather take her to Scarborough to see Ken Dodd who has sticking-out hair, sticking-out teeth and who makes the lonely girl snort and guffaw with laughter throughout the show at the jokes, especially his opening one, "What a beautiful day for sticking a cucumber through someone's letterbox and shouting, 'Help, help! The Martians have landed!'"

She adores his mad hair, large teeth sticking out and ridiculous jokes. What she likes most though is the energy that surrounds him, and the fantastic feeling she gets from cackling and crowing with laughter throughout the performance, embarrassing both her mother and grandfather.

At the end of the show, Ken Dodd sings a song called Happiness, in which are the lines: "I thank the Lord that I've been blessed, with more than my share of happiness."

In the mind of the child, the words "happiness" and "laughter" get fused and she decides the only way to stop being picked on or be laughed at is to laugh first. So she does. She laughs at herself, even when her teeth fly out one day as she sneezes and starts telling jokes. She doesn't let anyone bug her and, hey presto, a humorous writer and comedian is born.

Yes, that lonely child was me, and Ken Dodd's first joke still makes me snort with laughter.

Laughter is the most powerful weapon in our arsenal and I have written at length about the benefits of laughter. Indeed, my day is not complete unless I have made at least ten people laugh. Why? I don't know. I guess I'm addicted to laughter and to seeing people giggle.

Books afford escape from reality, but a book that can make you laugh as well makes you feel really good after reading it. That's why I write humour.

You're clearly a big comedy fan. What else makes you snort with laughter?

Oh goodness, where do I begin? I've watched all sorts of comedy shows since the 1970s.

In terms of modern comedians there is such a wide choice, but I love Jimmy Carr and all of the 8 Out Of 10 Cats team; Lee Mack; Jo Brand; Bill Bailey; and Jack Dee, who reminds me of my grumpy husband.

I watch lots of comedy shows but still love some of the older shows of the seventies and eighties, especially Fawlty Towers and will happily watch my DVD boxset time after time.

I am a big Ben Elton fan and have read all his books. They are all excellent but my favourite is Chart Throb - so funny.

When you're writing, do you focus on making sure humorous lines are inserted, or does the humour just infuse itself into the dialogue without you having to plan it?

It comes naturally. Once I have got into the character - I employ a sort of method-acting idea and get into each of my characters' heads before I write - their dialogue will come naturally and is generally filled with humour.

Sometimes, I go back and remove some of the lines so it doesn't sound like the character has been eating jellybeans for breakfast, lunch and dinner. There's nothing worse than overdoing the humour. It needs to be balanced and I often juxtapose humour with bathos in my books and keep my readers' emotions working in harmony.

Carol E Wyer

Aside from writing, you've recently ventured into stand-up? What made you make that move?

I always practise what I preach in my books and that's why I have ended up diving with sharks, ziplining, scoffing mealworm and locusts and then zorbing in one of those large plastic balls as well as driving a 4x4 across a glacier in Iceland.

The stand-up came about because I'd written a book entitled Grumpy Old Menopause and in it I'd stated women should try various new experiences to win back confidence lost during menopause. One of the crazier ideas was pole dancing but I had frozen shoulder at the time and didn't fancy hanging off a pole by my teeth, so I chose the next crazy idea which was stand-up...

I did a crash course and wrote a routine for a library event. It went down so well I was booked at libraries throughout the Midlands, and then the Isle of Wight Literary Festival, to do my 'Smile While You Have Teeth' routine. It is aimed at an older audience and so far it's gone down well.

I guess it helps being an older comic. I can't see the audience and their reactions and I can't hear if they are yelling obscenities at me!

What's next for you Carol?

I have another book due out in September. We're keeping this one under wraps until Life Swap is published but I can promise you more twists and humour. Then I am going to finish writing my first thriller. My dark side is clammering to be released and I ought to exercise it.

Our final question: if you could swap lives with anyone, who would you pick?

I'd swap with stylish Celia Sawyer: entrepreneur, owner of a hugely successful interior design business, dealer on Channel 4's Four Rooms, and one of the UK most influential businesswomen.

She's utterly glamorous, has a property portfolio that includes homes in London and Barbados, is a successful columnist, flies about in a private jet, hangs out with celebrities but most of all she has a fantastic collection of boots and shoes! I want them! Not sure she'd want to come and live on a windy hill with Mr Grumpy though!

To find out more about 'Life Swap' and Carol's other books, and for purchase links, visit www.carolewyer.co.uk

Published: Monday 4th April 2016

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