Parsley Sidings. Copyright: BBC.

Parsley Sidings

BBC Radio 2 sitcom about a railway station. 21 episodes (pilot + 2 series), 1971 - 1973. Stars Arthur Lowe, Ian Lavender, Kenneth Connor and Liz Fraser.

Horace Hepplewhite (Series 1-2)

AKA: Mr Hepplewhite.  Station Master (Grade 3).   Played by: Arthur Lowe

Horace is one in a long line of Hepplewhite's to be the station master in charge of Parsley Sidings. He does things by the book and often comes across as old fashioned and pompous, while also being proud of his station and his Britishness. He always addresses his London bosses by the station they work for, such as "Euston himself".

He has a sister, Maud, who lives in Great Yarmouth. Horace does not get on with her because she married outside of the railway. Horace lives with his never-heard wife, and his son Bert.

Bertrand Hepplewhite (Series 1-2)

AKA: Bert Hepplewhite.  Booking Hall Ticket Office Clerk.   Played by: Ian Lavender

Bertrand, also known as Bert, officially works in the ticket office, but in reality works wherever his father thinks he will do the least harm. While on duty, he has to refer to his father as 'Mr Hepplewhite', while Horace just refers to him as 'Hepplewhite'.

Bert is somewhat stupid. He tries to find work outside of the station, but during his time as a milkman he posted the milk bottles through people's letterboxes. Bert is actually so stupid that he does not notice that Gloria Simpkins is in love with him.

Percy Valentine (Series 1-2)

Station Porter (Grade 3).   Played by: Kenneth Connor

Percy is a cockney porter who will do anything in order to make a bit of money, and is normally found doing some kind of dodgy deal. Whenever something is found to have gone wrong or gone missing in the station, he is normally found at the bottom of it.

Mr Bradshaw (Series 1-2)

AKA: George Stevenson Bradshaw.  Signalman.   Played by: Kenneth Connor

Mr Bradshaw is an old man who started his work at Parsley Sidings during the time it was controlled by Horace's grandfather Jeremiah.

He is very vague and hard of hearing, which often results in him misunderstanding what other people are saying. However, despite this, Bradshaw is still very good at his job.

Gloria Simpkins (Series 1-2)

Secretary and Tannoy Announcer.   Played by: Liz Fraser

Sweet and innocent Gloria would like nothing more than to be Bert's girlfriend. However, because of Bert's idiocy, he never notices her affections. She often gets annoyed by Percy's attempts to con her love.