Written by: One random comedian, eight random questions; it's the ultimate test of funny person and fate. This week's tip-top transatlantic talent is John Hastings, the fine Canadian comedian who now resides over here, but not in Hastings, as far as we know. He should be knocking around central London soon, anyway.
"Oh hello," says Hastings. "I am coming to Soho this week, and then Melbourne Comedy Festival and then, like, other places."
Well, hopefully he's in Soho this week: Hastings is due to do a run at the Soho Theatre from 6-8 Feb, with the show 10 John Hastings I Hate About You. But at the time of writing Dean Street has been closed off due to a WWII bomb. So that's exciting, but probably all sorted by the time Thursday rolls around.
You just don't get that sort of thing in Canada, though. John Hastings, your Random 8 await.
Who is - or was - your most interesting relative?
They are all pretty awesomely fascinating. Aunt Ida features heavily in this current show, and you should see the show to see what she had to say recently at a funeral.
What's the oddest thing you've ever eaten?
Crow, the day after the Brexit referendum.
Which low-key law would you introduce?
People who start a criticism with the words 'Um, actually...'
What's the worst job you've ever had?
I ripped up a carpet in what would be described as a litter box, but for people. I cut myself and my boss told me to walk it off.
Ever met a particularly great or awful celebrity?
I met Boris Johnson at Paddington Station. He helped me lock my bike up and he looked like he woke up in a skip and had recently changed out of shitted clothing.
What's the best thing you ever bought a ticket for?
Ticket to London, so I could move to the UK. Or an Alice Cooper concert in 2015.
Do you have a signature dish?
Toast. Here is the key: use the timer function and don't be afraid to re-enter the bread.
Ever walked out of a film?
Yes. To use the bathroom, and then I would promptly return.