INT. DAY. HOME.
A MIDDLE AGED MAN HAS ARRIVED HOME FROM WORK AND HE IS TALKING TO HIS WIFE, HE IS ALSO FARTING CONTINUOUSLY.
WIFE: Nice day at work love?
MAN: Not too bad, the usual, you know.
CUT TO NIGHT. MAN AND WIFE IN BEDROOM SLEEPING. THE MAN IS STILL DOING A CONTINUOUS FART.
CUT TO DAY. THE MAN IS AT WORK IN HIS OWN OFFICE SPEAKING ON THE PHONE, THE FART CONTINUES.
MAN: Ok mate, meet you in The Bricklayers at six.
CUT TO PUB SCENE. MAN IS PLAYING DARTS WITH HIS MATE AND IS STILL DOING A CONTINUOUS FART.
CUT TO BOWLING GREEN. THE MAN IS NOW OLDER LOOKING YET HE IS STILL DOING THE NEVER ENDING FART.
CUT TO LIVING ROOM SCENE. THE MAN IS A PENSIONER NOW AND HAS HIS CHILDREN AND GRANDCHILDREN ROUND FOR DINNER. HE IS STILL FARTING BUT IS TALKING TO HIS SON-IN-LAW.
MAN: That new motor must have cost you a packet?
SON IN LAW: It's all HP nowadays, isn't it?
THE FART SUDDENLY STOPS. EVERYONE STOPS EATING AND LOOKS AT THE MAN. THERE IS COMPLETE SILENCE FOR FIVE SECONDS. THE MAN EMITS A LOUD BELCH WHICH IS ALSO CONTINUOUS. EVERYONE STARTS EATING AND CHATTING AGAIN.
CUT TO EXT. GRANDKIDS AND THEIR PARENTS LEAVE THE MAN'S HOME. HE IS STANDING BESIDE HIS WIFE AND WAVES THEM OFF, HIS MOUTH IS OPEN AS THE BELCH CONTINUES.
ENDS.
I can honestly say that I have never posted anything as daft as this.
