This was written as a submission for a Scottish Show hence the dialect.
INJURY LAWYERS THE NOO:
GRAMS: SERIOUS CLASSICAL TYPE MUSIC
FX: ECHOEY BANGING OF A JUDGE’S HAMMER
FEMALE VOICE:
Hae you been injurt in an accident? For see if ye have, then we’re the very folk for you. Just call Injury Lawyers the Noo on a no win no fee basis.
Let’s hear Wullie’s story just now.
WULLIE:
I was comin’ home fay the pub after a quiet night oot. Nothin’ too mad like, Ah’d just had the twelve pints o' Buckie.
Anyway all of a sudden ah seen this lad walkin’ over the other side o’ the road wi’ a new phone that ah wanted. Well time’s is hard like, and it’d been three months since ah changed mah phone. The lads was beginnin’ tae take the pish, ye ken?
FEMALE VOICE:
An altercation ensued during which Wullie got a right good diggin’ but ye shouldee seen the aither fella!
Nevertheless it became necessary fae Wullie to have extensive dental work to replace the knocked oot crowns and gold fillings that he had only recently had done on the Social.
He called Injury Lawyers the Noo on a no win no fee basis, and we got him compo of five hunnert quod. He was made up ‘cos he was able tae buy the phone he wanted hisself and was able tae sell the one he nicked during the fight, doon the boozer for another fufty.
So if you’ve had an accident or been injurt in any way why no’ call us and we’ll see what we can do for ye. We’re the bizzo!
(End)
