Scene: hospital office. Dr Smith at desk. A tall man enters:
Dr Acula: Hello, I'm here for the Phlebotomy job, blood testing department.
Dr Smith: Yes, welcome Dr.......?
Dr Acula: Acula.
Dr Smith: Ah yes. Dr Acula. Is that Romanian?
Dr Acula: No, Transylvanian.
Dr Smith: Ah, OK. Sorry about Brexit.
Dr Acula: Brexit?
Dr Smith: Oh, it doesn't matter. Well, let's look at your CV..........You've certainly worked in blood testing a long time.
Dr Acula: Yes indeed, you could say it runs in the family. My father vos into blood, as vos my grandfather and my great grandfather also.
Dr Smith: So what makes you qualified for the post of blood testing manager?
Dr Acula: I have a great passion for blood. I know it inside out. I live for it. And I have a 2:1 degree from Derby University.
Dr Smith: What blood type are you yourself?
Dr Acula: A.
Dr Smith: What blood type are you?
Dr Acula: A.
Dr Smith: I said, What blood type are you yourself?
Dr Acula: A. Blood type A. Does this matter for the job?
Dr Smith: Not really, we just ask as we ran out of questions. Well, you're certainly qualified for the post. Do you have any questions about the job?
Dr Acula: Yes, could I vork night shifts?
Dr Smith: Why yes, that's possible.
Dr Acula: I vondered if I could do blood vork from home? I have all the equipment needed.
Dr Smith: it's an unusual request, vhy? Sorry. why?
Dr Acula: My patients vould be more comfortable. They never complain. And I like flexible hours.
Dr Smith: No, this wouldn't be possible.
Dr Acula: (trying hypnosis) YES, I CAN WORK FROM HOME. YES, I CAN WORK FROM HOME.
Dr Smith: No you can't, why have your eyes gone weird? Are you trying to.......hang on, you're a bloody vampire aren't you?
Dr Acula: NO, I'M NOT A BLOODY.....
Dr Smith: Stop trying that hypnosis crap, we've all seen Star Wars. Get out of my office.......(Dr Acula leaves in a huff). Bloody vampires. Then again, we are short staffed for our night time paramedic staff......(runs after Dr Acula)..............Dr Acula, Dr Acula....