British Comedy Guide

when smoking is banned picking up chicks?


comedywriter dude

  • Monday 29th February 2016, 10:06am
  • Australia
  • 225 posts

I'm not the normal comedian, I don't do political correctness
smoking is bad for youthat's for sure

but put up yoru hands smokers?

audience puts up their hands

yer we all suck right

audience laughs

i'm a smoker myself, now I'm not condoining smoking at all

but we all have to wonder, us smokers do have an edge, non smokers are inside

us smokers are outside with other chick smokers and can offer them a smoke

put up hands who hooked a chick with the best hook up line ever

want a smoke

right see all those hands up

I mean year we might die quicker but well get laid more

(audience laughs)

yer smoking is bad, I want to say its bad again and again its bad never smoke.

but if you think about it your parents probably met having smoke and a drink

it makes me think about the future

and why anyone will ever bother going outside in a pub in the future

they probably won't even have outside areas , has anyone thought about that the future of no cigerettes

the futures might be cracking onto her next to a poker machine, waiting around hoping she''s get free spins so you can say how you doing

but she'l knock you off she'lls think your taking her money

like smoking or not one of the biggest crack on lines will be gone

it might be with these new smokes want to try my apple viper smoke



  • Saturday 5th March 2016, 2:41pm
  • Coventry, England
  • 146 posts

as I'm not a smoker I have no clue if being a smoker leads to more opportunity to have sex with women. I think there's definitely something there about smoking having quite a sexy image back in the day and now the way they've been replaced by stuff like Nicorette patches and e-cigs its no longer such a cool and sexy habit anymore.

Maybe its just me but the way you write about women and sex does seem a little old fashioned.

Mates that I have who smoke definitely hate the smoking ban but now use smoking as an excuse to leave dull or awkward situations (especially in the pub). Perhaps there is something there that could be developed?