When I saw this week's Skit Comp theme, this is what sprang to mind, a dig at the lack of perspective when it comes to the relationship between celebrity and current affairs. I sort of immediately wrote half of this in my head - but then I saw what Michael had posted, which addressed a similar area (and, I have to say, did it better).
To be honest, I'm glad, because I'm very happy with what I did instead, but it seemed as though I may as well type out what was in my head anyway, as it didn't take long. So here it is, just for the record.
[Throbbing electronic bed - I mean music, not some Barbarella prop. Idiot.]
CLANCY: Hi, and welcome to the 12 second news.
Beyonce has snubbed top novelist Jeanette Winterson, claiming she'd never heard of her! At a glitzy Hollywood bash last night the pop diva had this to say.
[VT noise of party atmos]
BEYONCE: Err, I've never heard of her.
In other news, the cabinet is on fire. Join me for your next bulletin, in a week.
...
CLANCY: Hi! I'm Clancy Brorke, and this is your 12 second news bulletin.
A film has been premiered. It happened in exactly the location and manner originally planned. Stars were out in force, including Simon MacCorkindale, Norma Major, and Captain & Tennille. Celebs dazzled on the red carpet, then went inside. They came out 2 hours and 13 minutes later, none of them angry or crying, so the film was a resounding success.
Also, Greenland has been destroyed.
Your next bulletin in a month - maybe more, if nothing interesting happens.
...
CLANCY: This is your 12 secod news blast, I'm Clancy Brorke, Jr.
Holly Willoughby has got a hat. [Pause] Join us for more - oh, yeah, in other news, space crabs are our new crustacean overlords. More news when the Black Pincer Media Control Phalanx says it's allowed!
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