Sitcom Critique Wanted Page 2

Quote: enigmatic @ 7th January 2016, 6:55 PM GMT

I read it to the end, even though I got the joke :)

Generally agree there's a little too much banter (the discussion about a reality show that doesn't exist in particular springing to mind). Fortunately, your script is probably too long for a 22-25min episode anyway, so trimming that shouldn't hurt. And keep the "man, screen got scratched" bit, it's probably the funniest.

I like the line about being "gnawed to death by the cutest animals on the planet!" but can't help thinking you could have had the characters acknowledge the ridiculousness of the situation earlier.

Probably could benefit from at least one character (in the office or in the woods) that starts out thinking squirrels are nice, fluffy animals that just want to be friends; if not one of the characters being a full-blown animal rights activist.

Thank you for the feedback.

Yeah, I did something similar in an earlier draft, but got cut along the way. Might revisit that.