Favourite OFAH insult

Only Fools And Horses. Image shows from L to R: Uncle Albert (Buster Merryfield), Del (David Jason), Rodney (Nicholas Lyndhurst). Copyright: BBC.

Only Fools And Horses

Sitcom about two market traders, Del Boy and his brother Rodney

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Gordon Bennett

  • Wednesday 20th February 2013, 8:47am
  • Basel, Switzerland
  • 19,199 posts

Inspired by the "Favourite Blackadder insults" thread I was thinking about OFAH insults. And there were lots of them.

Here's one:

Del: (about Rodney) "I think he's very much like you, Grandad!"

Grandad: "What, dignified in defeat?"

Del: "No, a ponce!"

Great how Del Boy manages to insult two people at once.

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Gordon Bennett

  • Wednesday 20th February 2013, 9:15am [Edited]
  • Basel, Switzerland
  • 19,199 posts

And one of my favourites:

Rodney lost his job at Alan Parry's firm and gets replaced by a young trainee called Elvis.

Del: "The spotty one? Only left school last year?"
.....

Rodney: "...Elvis is not daft."

Del: "There's no danger of him winning Blockbusters though, is there? (To Albert) He's the one who thought sugar diabetes was a Welsh flyweight."

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JohnnyD

  • Wednesday 20th February 2013, 9:40am
  • Bray, England
  • 1,522 posts

You plonker!

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Nigel Ball

  • Wednesday 20th February 2013, 2:40pm [Edited]
  • warrington, England
  • 504 posts

Not so much an insult: He died a couple of years before I was born. Trigger about his dad.

Insult from Del boy About Granddad. His brain went years ago, now his legs have gone. There's only the middle bit of him left. :D :D

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G180e

  • Wednesday 20th February 2013, 2:50pm
  • Wolverhampton, England
  • 3,369 posts

"Oh Shut Up , You Tart!"

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Gordon Bennett

  • Wednesday 20th February 2013, 3:52pm [Edited]
  • Basel, Switzerland
  • 19,199 posts
Quote: Nigel Ball @ February 20 2013, 2:40 PM GMT

Insult from Del boy About Granddad. His brain went years ago, now his legs have gone. There's only the middle bit of him left. :D :D


Yes, that was great.
Insulting old people is really funny; here's another example:

Boycie to Albert while seeing a hearse: "Albert, your mini cab has arrived!!" Laughing out loud

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Nigel Ball

  • Wednesday 20th February 2013, 6:41pm
  • warrington, England
  • 504 posts
Quote: Gordon Bennett @ February 20 2013, 3:52 PM GMT

Yes, that was great.
Insulting old people is really funny; here's another example:

Boycie to Albert while seeing a hearse: "Albert, your mini cab has arrived!!" Laughing out loud

Laughing out loud Laughing out loud

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Tim Azure

  • Wednesday 20th February 2013, 8:34pm
  • Kent, England
  • 2,037 posts

You can't do better than "Wodney..."

In the same episode "What do expect from someone who gets his props from Mathesons?"

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Gordon Bennett

  • Wednesday 20th February 2013, 9:03pm
  • Basel, Switzerland
  • 19,199 posts

Boycie about Trigger:
"Have you ever spent an evening in Trigger's flat? It's like having a séance with Mr Bean."

Boycie and Del about the Driscoll Brothers:

Boycie: "Well, one of them looks like he was evicted from the planet of the apes."

Del: "Yeah, and the other one reminds me of Cliff Richard."

Mike: "What, he's younger than his years?"

Del: "No, he's got one of them faces you'd like to slap."

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peter gazzard

  • Wednesday 20th February 2013, 9:06pm
  • England
  • 839 posts

Del to Albert:That laugh of yours,sounds like someone trying to jump start a Lada
Rodney to Del:If you had been in charge of the Last Supper it would have been a takeaway Laughing out loud

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Edwin

  • Thursday 21st February 2013, 2:09am [Edited]
  • Florida, United States
  • 205 posts

"When Boycie was born, the midwife held him up and slapped his mother."

"You smell like a vegetarians fart."

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Gordon Bennett

  • Thursday 21st February 2013, 9:11am
  • Basel, Switzerland
  • 19,199 posts
Quote: Edwin @ February 21 2013, 2:09 AM GMT

"When Boycie was born, the midwife held him up and slapped his mother."

Laughing out loud Completely forgot about that.

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Alfred J Kipper

  • Thursday 21st February 2013, 9:24am [Edited]
  • Aldershot, England
  • 6,261 posts
Quote: Edwin @ February 21 2013, 2:09 AM GMT

"When Boycie was born, the midwife held him up and slapped his mother."

Laughing out loud Which episode was that in please?

Good thread Gordon, shows a real writer putting a young pretender in his place. These are lovely insults for defo.

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Gordon Bennett

  • Thursday 21st February 2013, 10:46am [Edited]
  • Basel, Switzerland
  • 19,199 posts

Marlene (about Rodney): "You must have missed him when he left your partnership."

Del: "Oh yeah, I missed him like George Michael missed Andrew Ridgely."

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Tim Azure

  • Thursday 21st February 2013, 11:01am
  • Kent, England
  • 2,037 posts
Quote: Gordon Bennett @ February 21 2013, 10:46 AM GMT

Marlene (about Rodney): "You must have missed him when he left your partnership."

Del: "Oh yeah, I missed him like George Michael missed Andrew Ridgely."


Bit dated now, isn't it?