Rape jokes Page 22

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lofthouse

  • Thursday 19th May 2011, 8:19pm
  • Nowhere, England
  • 8,980 posts

If Frankie Boyle said that you'd be laughing.

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sootyj

  • Thursday 19th May 2011, 8:22pm
  • England
  • 51,287 posts
Quote: lofthouse @ May 19 2011, 8:12 PM BST

Yes. Im sure if they were actual rape jokes we'd be up to around 80 pages or so by now.

Here's one

Why is rape so rare?

Because women with their skirts over their heads run faster than men with their pants around their ankles.


Lofthouse be not proud that's ancient

Why did the lisping police officer arrest 10 Catholics.
He thought they were papists!

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KM378

  • Thursday 19th May 2011, 8:23pm
  • London, England
  • 5,615 posts

If you Google for "rape jokes" one of the suggestions it offers is "statutory rape jokes". There's obviously demand for this niche.

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sootyj

  • Thursday 19th May 2011, 8:25pm
  • England
  • 51,287 posts

"I'm not funny and a bully so I'm going to give up comedy and become a Budhist"

Quote: lofthouse @ May 19 2011, 8:19 PM BST

If Frankie Boyle said that you'd be laughing.


Yup that'd cheer me right up.

Quote: Kevin Murphy @ May 19 2011, 8:23 PM BST

If you Google for "rape jokes" one of the suggestions it offers is "statutory rape jokes". There's obviously demand for this niche.


What's so funny about having non consensual sex with a statue?

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Vader

  • Thursday 19th May 2011, 8:38pm
  • England
  • 1,037 posts

It depends who the statue's depicting.

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Marc P

  • Thursday 19th May 2011, 11:21pm
  • England
  • 17,698 posts
Quote: lofthouse @ May 19 2011, 8:19 PM BST

If Frankie Boyle said that you'd be laughing.


Why?

Image
Night

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lofthouse

  • Friday 20th May 2011, 12:20am
  • Nowhere, England
  • 8,980 posts
Quote: sootyj @ May 19 2011, 8:22 PM BST

Lofthouse be not proud that's ancient


I'm not proud.

Blame Google , not me!

I don't actually carry any rape jokes around in my brain.

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Gokkun

  • Monday 13th June 2011, 2:17pm
  • England
  • 47 posts

I find it terribly depressing that there are millions of young boys in Britain who aspire to become rapists when they grow up.

Just to avoid any confusion, please note that I use 'rapist' and 'Premier League Footballer' interchangably.

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Bill Jaguar

  • Monday 13th June 2011, 4:17pm [Edited]
  • England
  • 687 posts

A man was arrested due to his poor grasp of the English language.
He boastfully exclaimed in the street that he had raped as recently as the night before. He told all who were listening that he would be raping again that very night and invited everyone to come along and watch.
The police were called and the man was taken to the station. The man, white and in his thirties, upon being taken to his cell asked if there was a 'tape' he could use. It then occurred to the officers that this might not be what it seemed, and after a quick Google their worst fears had been realised. They had not arrested a self-confessed rapist but wrongfully arrested a white 'rapper'.
The officers didn't want to bear the brunt of the bad press this would generate, so they decided to pin the robbery of a jeweler on him. The rapper was sentenced to 20 years in prison owing to the fact that there was no improvement in his diction and I have just been sentenced to 15 years for crimes against comedy under section 2 of the 'joke is too long, too boring' act.

A happy ending all round then.

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Peter Brouhaha

  • Wednesday 29th June 2011, 2:54pm [Edited]
  • England
  • 319 posts
Quote: sootyj @ May 19 2011, 8:25 PM BST

"I'm not funny and a bully so I'm going to give up comedy and become a Budhist"

Yup that'd cheer me right up.

What's so funny about having non consensual sex with a statue?


Probably something to do with man-made erections.

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sootyj

  • Wednesday 29th June 2011, 5:15pm
  • England
  • 51,287 posts

Not bad, you're getting quite good at these one liners.

I saw a really sexy statue of a lady, it was made out of vitamin enriched choco milk powder.
It was THE VENUS DE MILO!

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KM378

  • Wednesday 29th June 2011, 5:50pm
  • London, England
  • 5,615 posts

Q: How many rapists does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: Shut it, you f**king whore!

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Peter Brouhaha

  • Wednesday 29th June 2011, 7:22pm
  • England
  • 319 posts
Quote: sootyj @ June 29 2011, 5:15 PM BST

Not bad, you're getting quite good at these one liners.

I saw a really sexy statue of a lady, it was made out of vitamin enriched choco milk powder.
It was THE VENUS DE MILO!


Cheers, Doc. And thanks again for your sage advice yesterday.

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funnylife mee

  • Wednesday 6th July 2011, 7:24pm
  • England
  • 3 posts

Worth reading...

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Bill Jaguar

  • Wednesday 6th July 2011, 7:37pm
  • England
  • 687 posts
Quote: Peter Brouhaha @ June 29 2011, 2:54 PM BST

Probably something to do with man-made erections.


Haha, man-made, that is a gay joke If I have ever seen one.