Playfull invented a breakfast cereal aimed at comedians - 'A-muesli' (see what he did there). He intended to take it to the Edinburgh festival this year as part of his 'One Man - One Testicle Show'. Unfortunately Tim Vine (don't be fooled by the nice guy act) found out and in order to not have attention diverted from him, he asked Cannon & Ball to come up with a stupefying agent he could administer via the post.
Unfortunately Cannon & Ball had a bit of a swindle going on and whenever a bitter comedian or evil dictator (you spot the difference) hired them in such manner they would sub-contract out to Les Dennis. Now everyone knows that Les Dennis can't read any word with an 'i' in it, so not surprisingly he f**ked it up and inadvertently created Covid19. In a panic he called his ex-wife Amanda Holden (her with the nice fronties) to seek her advice. She was busy at the time washing David Walliams from Simon Cowell so told him the first thing that came into her head:
"Go to China and find a cave full of bats. Feed the Covid19 to them to get rid of it - simple"
Playfull found out about this from the comedian snitch Ted Bovis. He was going to tell the World Health Orginisation but to get back at Tim Vine he didn't bother his arse. So let's all blame Playfull for our isolation.
*disclaimer. I ate a very strong cheese before going to bed last night so there is an outside chance that I dreamt all this.
*further disclaimer - this account is also very similar to Series 3, Episode 12 of Tales of the Unexpected - the one where Hannah Gordon gets her norks out.