Make an unfounded claim about the poster above you Page 240

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Teddy Paddalack

  • Wednesday 24th July 2019, 10:51pm [Edited]
  • Everton, England
  • 3,107 posts

Beaky owns a deck chair franchise in Brighton. that he operates from off shore. He got the start up money in the 70's by forging Hogarth etchings with a safety pin and selling them to unsuspecting art dealers up and down the south coast.
Following a close shave at Boscombe Fine Arts in Dorset, he fled to Spain and now etches Picaaso's in his Villa/ Hideout.

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beaky

  • Wednesday 24th July 2019, 11:48pm
  • Malaga and Brighton, United Kingdom
  • 2,691 posts

It's meant to be unfounded, Teddy!

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Firkin

  • Thursday 25th July 2019, 3:21pm [Edited]
  • United Kingdom
  • 778 posts

Beaky has rebellious underpants, there's been an uprising.

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Hercules Grytpype Thynne

  • Friday 26th July 2019, 11:38am
  • England
  • 16,533 posts

Firkin has gone into his local newsagent every day since Christmas 1994 with the lottery ticket he bought then, still convinced that Mr Patel is lying to him about it not being a winning ticket after the Christmas cracker motto said his life was going to change dramatically.

Mr Patel is taking out a harassment injunction.

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chipolata

  • Friday 26th July 2019, 11:48am
  • England
  • 29,994 posts

Herc wears a suit of living ants at all times, despite the fact that it's incredibly itchy and looks bad.

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lofthouse

  • Friday 26th July 2019, 8:15pm
  • Nowhere, England
  • 9,108 posts

Chip likes to keep cool in this hot weather by keeping packets of frozen fish fingers down his underpants

Although successful in keeping the temperature down - the downside is that the pungent stench from his fishy gonads attracts cats from miles around

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Hercules Grytpype Thynne

  • Saturday 27th July 2019, 12:24am
  • England
  • 16,533 posts

lofthouse still has a family packet of Rinso soap flakes on his hall chair in case the lady from P&G is still about in her Rinso van and he can claim his 10/- note if she calls at his house.

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Firkin

  • Sunday 28th July 2019, 6:26pm
  • United Kingdom
  • 778 posts

Herc uses his Y fronts as a mouse trap. Cheesy.

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Hercules Grytpype Thynne

  • Monday 29th July 2019, 12:03am
  • England
  • 16,533 posts

Firkin keeps a tally of how many nails he has counted in each neighbour's shed - for f**k's sake don't ask him to show you his note book on it 'cos he'll talk to you about it for hours and point out the most interesting nails he saw.

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chipolata

  • Tuesday 30th July 2019, 4:24pm
  • England
  • 29,994 posts

Herc thought he was suffering from arthritis, but a trip to the doctors revealed it to be rigor mortis.

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Hercules Grytpype Thynne

  • Wednesday 31st July 2019, 12:01am
  • England
  • 16,533 posts

Chip has his face tattooed on the back of his head so people don't know whether he's coming or going.

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Firkin

  • Wednesday 31st July 2019, 4:51pm [Edited]
  • United Kingdom
  • 778 posts

Herc threw a litre of yellow emulsion over his 12 year old grandson as it was cheaper than taking him paintballing.

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playfull

  • Friday 2nd August 2019, 9:38am [Edited]
  • Nottingham, England
  • 1,653 posts

Firkin is keyboard phobic. Or to be more accurate is keyboard finger phobic. So he has learnt to type using just his toes. You should see him trying to text on the bus...

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Hercules Grytpype Thynne

  • Friday 2nd August 2019, 3:00pm
  • England
  • 16,533 posts

Playfull has such a severe comb over that his left-hand ear is one inch higher than the other one, and this he tries to counterbalance by wearing a large brass curtain ring in the higher ear, but people are beginning to notice and try their hardest not to snigger.

He feels such a fool.

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chipolata

  • Monday 2nd September 2019, 9:37am [Edited]
  • England
  • 29,994 posts

Herc has been trapped in a tineloop for the last 47 years, endlessly reliving the same day again and again. He's getting sick of it.