Things that piss you off Page 1779

Avatar

Rood Eye

  • Saturday 4th April 2020, 3:54am
  • England
  • 3,852 posts

My best guess is that, because Kevin is a carrot, he is concerned that as few of his fellow carrots as possible should be put to death for human consumption.

Rather macabre, I know.

Avatar

john tregorran

  • Saturday 4th April 2020, 6:06am
  • mornington,victoria, Australia
  • 1,012 posts

Replacement toilet seats.Ours has broke,no problem,easy enough to replace.You'd think most toilets are the same size.Not here they are not !

Avatar

Michael Monkhouse

  • Saturday 4th April 2020, 9:26am [Edited]
  • Eternal City, Italy
  • 4,702 posts
Quote: lofthouse @ 3rd April 2020, 12:14 PM

Candles. They get on my wick

Huh? Candles are wicked.

Quote: Rood Eye @ 3rd April 2020, 12:35 PM

Chauffeurs who take me to places that are not accessible by driving in a single straight line from our starting point.

They drive me round the bend.

Ten years with a taxi and still nothing to chau fer it.
I don't like livestock rustlers. They get my goat.
I don't like handkies. They get up my nose.
I don't like One Direction. They're shit.

Avatar

Michael Monkhouse

  • Saturday 11th April 2020, 9:03am
  • Eternal City, Italy
  • 4,702 posts

The only thing I hate more than coronavirus are all these cute, twee, limp-wristed 'let's all be nice' comments all over bacefook. 'Think of three things you like every day for thirty days.' No. F**k you. How the f**k can I think of three things I like every day for thirty days? There are only five Spice Girls. I wouldn't even get through the weekend. And even if I did, it'd still be Monday afterwards. So f**k you. Really. No joke coming. F**k you.

Avatar

Billy Bunter

  • Saturday 11th April 2020, 9:55am [Edited]
  • The Sussex Coast, England
  • 1,226 posts
Quote: Michael Monkhouse @ 11th April 2020, 9:03 AM

'Think of three things you like every day for thirty days.'

Horse racing, football, Wimbledon fortnight, the Open golf championship, having a bet on live sporting events, meeting friends at the races, seeing my 8 year old great niece & 4 year old great nephew, going to the theatre, popping down to Dorset for a few days, meeting friends for coffee, going out for tea & cake, holidays in Tenerife...

Mmm, that's cheered me up no end. :(

Avatar

Michael Monkhouse

  • Saturday 11th April 2020, 10:05am
  • Eternal City, Italy
  • 4,702 posts

Day 1. Mel C, Melanie C, Sporty Spice.
Day 2. Mel Chisholm, Melanie Chisholm, Mel 'Sporty' C.

Avatar

Michael Monkhouse

  • Friday 17th April 2020, 10:36am
  • Eternal City, Italy
  • 4,702 posts

The invisible man when he ejaculates. I can't see where he's coming from.

Avatar

Paul Wimsett

  • Friday 17th April 2020, 11:03am
  • Folkestone, United Kingdom
  • 3,379 posts
Quote: Michael Monkhouse @ 11th April 2020, 10:05 AM

Day 1. Mel C, Melanie C, Sporty Spice.
Day 2. Mel Chisholm, Melanie Chisholm, Mel 'Sporty' C.

You forget that Mel from the Spice Girls.

Avatar

lofthouse

  • Friday 17th April 2020, 2:30pm
  • Nowhere, England
  • 9,326 posts

Every time I visit this site people keep trying to sell me Ottomans

Do i look like Thora Hird?

Avatar

Definitely Tarby

  • Wednesday 22nd April 2020, 8:53pm
  • 1,994 posts

Behind a woman in a supermarket who let the cashier scan all the items and then started asking what individual items cost and asked for about 10 items to be cancelled. Why didn't they look at the price when it was on the shelf?

Avatar

Briosaid

  • Wednesday 22nd April 2020, 8:59pm
  • 1,356 posts
Quote: Definitely Tarby @ 22nd April 2020, 8:53 PM

Behind a woman in a supermarket who let the cashier scan all the items and then started asking what individual items cost and asked for about 10 items to be cancelled. Why didn't they look at the price when it was on the shelf?

Because she was a silly arse?

Avatar

Definitely Tarby

  • Wednesday 22nd April 2020, 9:14pm
  • 1,994 posts
Quote: Briosaid @ 22nd April 2020, 8:59 PM

Because she was a silly arse?

Laughing out loud

I'm usually good and letting annoying moments like that pass without letting it bother me but the woman was having a little discussion with I assume her daughter on what items to leave and what to put in the trolly making it very confusing for the cashier. She then tried paying with a voucher on her phone so the manager had to be called over but it wasn't working because the screen on her phone was cracked so it wasn't scanning. I was more annoyed with myself because the store was empty so I could have gone to a self service checkout and saved myself 15 minutes of standing there watching a woman debate over a tin of powdered milk but that awkward British thing meant I couldn't put my shopping back in my trolly and walk off which might have looked like an impatient hissy fit.

Avatar

Briosaid

  • Wednesday 22nd April 2020, 10:41pm
  • 1,356 posts

Why do people keep taking me seriously?