Coffee Time Football Quiz
Part 1 of 2
1. Sutton Utd have been elected to the football league. They will need to play their first fixtures away from home so that their artificial pitch can be replaced. But who DID invent fake grass?
A. The Moses Brown School
B. Percy Thrower
C. Grazing Cattle
D. Philby, Burgess and Maclean
2. All 20 Premier League teams have agreed to take the knee this season. But less than 1.5% of players have ever heard of the following except for one. Which one is it?
A Malcolm X
B Sammy Davis Junior
C Martin Luther King
D Dizzee Rascal
3. VAR will be tweaked for the coming season so that individual players with certain peculiar body parts will find that their strangeness becomes insignificant. Who of these will no longer be discriminated against?
B. Those who have had at least three dental fillings
C. The vasectomized
D. The ones who don't often cut their toe nails
4. Which of the following clubs football grounds is highest above sea level?
A. Northampton Town
B. East Stirlingshire
D. West Bromwich Albion
5. John Terry has announced he is leaving Aston Villa so that he can become a football manager. But which team has he really set his sights on managing?
A. England Ladies
B. Derby County
C. Guangzhou Evergrande Taobao, China.
Coffee Time Football Quiz
Part 2 of 2
6. Which of the following statements isn't true?
A. Michael Jackson attended a match at Fulham.
B. Grace Kelly attended a match at Dundee United.
C. Michael Jackson attended a match at Exeter City
D. Andy Murray attended a match at Wolverhampton Wanderers.
7. Which of the following football mascots tugs at the heartstrings the most while adding a little colour to your day?
A. A man in a dinosaur suit who receives the personal support of Mesut Ozil
B. A woman in a tiger suit who you never see but who is almost certainly Samantha Fox
C. A disabled child who has only two weeks to live and is inside a fluffy bunny rabbit
D. Any one of the ones who are none of the above and you personally have had sex with.
8. Rebecca Welch impressively makes football history by becoming the first woman referee in the football league. But who before her as a woman made the biggest impact on women becoming involved in the men's game?
A. Baroness Karren Brady, CBE
B Playboy model Cicciolina - "For Italia" (1990)
C. Actress Cheri Lunghi, Head Coach in the 1989 Channel 4 series "The Manageress"
D. Dame Vera Lynn
9. Four of the first eleven of a well known football club are unequivocally gay. But which is it?
A. Cefin Druids, Wrexham
B. Stonewall FC, Stratford, London
C The House of Commons First XI, Westminster, London
10. What has been the biggest motivational factor for players since the introduction of the England and Wales Premier League?
A Modern keep fit exercises, a vegetarian diet, and booze replaced by the injection of creatine
B. Loyalty to generations of fans that is even greater than it is to their wives and their children
C. The belief that when posing in public in underpants and with their latest tattoos it is meaningful
D. Money - plus a disdain for Scotland - and don't give us none of yer shrapnel
Good luck everyone. *wave**wave**wave*