Dry Dublin Wit 5

Hi again peeps,

Here's some more entertainment for you.....hope you enjoy!

I was talking with an ex-coach of mine from my schoolboy days when he mentioned that a club we played against were notorious for kicking the opposition off the park..........I humourously joked 'they may have thought they were great talking about their starting XI but rarely were they ever able to talk about their ENDING XI, the dirty b*stards'!!

We continued to talk about another team of hard lads that did likewise when I quipped 'they'd kick lumps out of a cancer-ridden leper's sugar bowl'!!

That's right, playing against them was a cure for cancer as they'd kick lumps out of you..........I'm telling you even if you had testicular cancer it wouldn't be long before you had the mark of boot laces 'cross your scrotum!!

My dad was clearing his flower bed one day during summer when he picked up what he said was a cat turd..........I said 'no way is that from a cat dad'..........now I've heard about the guy who invented cats eyes but if he saw the other end he'd have invented the pencil parer...........however if indeed that turd was from a cat and he saw it's arseh*le he'd have invented the tea towel holder instead!!

Hello Macker and Welcome to the BCG! Wave

Hi Macker.

Hi Macker. Nice to have an Irishman on board! Wave

The cat joke is a stock Ken Dodd gag.