Another comedy Sketch from Jon

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Animal Emergency Room
Description

Animal ER is a main emergency room where pets are brought in with a wide range of injuries and illnesses. They have specialist equipment ready to deal with anything from putting a rabbits leg into cast to a small amount of electric to restart a hamsters heart.

Dr. Steve Dooley – Young doctor mid 20’s, dark hair, good looking. Very eager to make a difference, treats animals like humans.

INT: ER ENTERANCE CORRIDOOR (Camera facing the door)

Entrance doors fly open as the (Vet) Paramedics wheel in a new patient.

INT: ER ENTERANCE CORRIDOOR (Camera moves to e ceiling view)

The bed flies past with just a small hamster in the middle.

INT: HOSPITAL SURGERY ROOM

Dr Dooley, Nurse Jones and Allan are in the room, they both hold onto the mini stretcher that the hamster is on ...

Dooley: one ... two ... three

They both lift the min stretcher onto a half sized bed, then Jones plugs the hamster in.
Camera shows the stats screen with a flat line, the hamster is dead.

Dr Dooley: Give me the stats Allan? (In a quick and important voice)

Allan: Name Scholesy, age 13 months, Diagnosis Cardiac arrest.

Dooley: Good god man we need to work fast pass me the paddles and set them to 12 volts.

Jones: Yes sir

Nurse Jones opens up a small box and there is a 12 volt and 24 volt battery, each attached with wires to two small paddles about 1cm wide. She passes the 12 volt set to Dooley. Dooley then licks them to check there is a current and places them near the chest of the hamster, then as he places the small paddles onto the hamsters’ chest...

Dooley: (shouting) CLEAR

Dooley repeats the sequence

Dooley: (shouting) CLEAR, (then in an upset voice) hold on Scholesy you can make it...

Dooley pushes Jones out of the way and opens up another small box, inside is a tube with a three inch diameter on one side and a 1 centimetre diameter on the other. Dooley places the 1 centimetre side in the hamsters’ mouth and then very slightly at the same time Dooley is using his little finger to massage the hamsters chest.
Then in the background there is a sound, beep beep beep. All of the staff turn to the screen. Everyone sighs with relief.

Dooley: (with a tear in his eye) oh Scholesy, you are a tough cookie.

Jones: Well done sir, you’re the master

Dooley stands proud with his head up.

Dooley: It’s times like this that make it all worth while, Jones.
Dooley: Allan, go and tell the owner of this little soldier that he lives, and will be back in a few days.

Allan: Yes Dr Dooley.

Dooley: Come Jones, we have much more work to do, many more lives to save.

Hi Jon

I did like this -- it's an original idea done well. Nicely paced too; no extra dialogue and gets straight to the point. Nicely done.

Dan

Good I like it, can't find fault with it. Well done

Hi Jon,

The only problem I can see is that it reminds me a lot of sketch on the Simpsons, it's quite similar, the vet is trying to save a hamsters life, I think they use a defibulator on it. In this case though the Hamster dies - "This is the part of the job I hate", as he tosses it into a waste paper basket.

Also, and I may be wrong about this, when writing are you supposed to avoid putting in camera directions and that type of thing? Directors don't like it or something!

I did find it funny though!

Quote: Ginger Jesus @ January 18, 2007, 3:28 PM

Hi Jon,
Also, and I may be wrong about this, when writing are you supposed to avoid putting in camera directions and that type of thing? Directors don't like it or something!

I'm pretty sure you're right here GJ.

I think the only way to get around this is to write your script so concisely that there's *no* way of avoiding the camera angles *you* want. ;)

Dan

I got this nice image of the little furry animals on the Egg commercials. Very descriptive and very funny.

Thanks all for your comments - Learning all the time from you guys 'n' girls thanks lots :O) Jon

Ginger Jesus is right about the Simpsons scene. I thought about that as soon as I started reading the sketch but I found that it offered me enough extra to overshadow what the Simpsons did. I wouldn't worry too much about that

I echo the Simpsons mention but you put enough difference into it to make it work. I like it.

Only point would be that the intro was padded out with character description and scenario set-up that should have been (and in this sketch was) clearly deducible from the dialogue and action.

I liked it. Maybe you could've squeezed a bit more humour out if the patient had been a goldfish! But it works as a general theme and deserves further on-development. Good stuff.

Hi Jon

Just spotted this and I enjoyed it too.

Now it just so happens that I've got a hamster with a fully paid up equity membership. Get your people to speak to my ... etc etc

;) ;)